It might be on the way to...

It might be on the way to San Jose: After the recent Metrolink crash, Councilman Nate Holden informed a reporter for The Times’ San Fernando Valley edition that he was thinking of riding the Santa Clarita-L.A. train to illustrate that the service is safe. Just one thing, though. Holden asked the reporter to tell him where “this Santa Clarita is.”

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Not a rat’s chance: A year ago, when Walt Disney was courting Long Beach with its Port Disney project, the company dispatched Mickey Mouse to preside as grand marshal of the Belmont Shore Christmas parade.

Since then, of course, Disney has abandoned that project, citing the city’s unexpected lack of enthusiasm as one of the reasons. And Mickey? Here’s a surprise. The chirpy rodent wasn’t available for this year’s Belmont Shore event.

We’re surprised Disney didn’t send Grumpy.

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At last, a frank advertising approach: Gerald Jones of L.A. found a store in the Wilshire area that doesn’t appear to be making a concession to the recession.

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Reining in USC: Compounding USC’s defeats to UCLA and Notre Dame is the depressing news for the school that one of its most famous performers will see only limited action next year. We mean Traveler.

A planned renovation of the Coliseum, including lowering the field and removing the track, will leave no room for the equine mascot to take his traditional romp around the field. “There will be an area for Traveler to appear, but he obviously won’t have a running track to sprint around,” said USC spokesman Tim Tessalone.

The horse is a tradition dating back three decades when he was ridden by the late Richard Saukko, who appeared in a costume that Charlton Heston had worn in “Ben Hur.” Perhaps Heston could ask for divine intervention to prevent Traveler’s role from being diminished.

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Is Traveler hearing footsteps? While USC’s Tessalone said that Traveler would be back next year, there was inevitably speculation that the school might return to a canine mascot, such as George Tirebiter, its beloved mangy symbol of the 1940s.

Tirebiter, who was once kidnaped and emblazoned with the initials “UCLA,” had his career (and life) come to an end when he was run down by a car while on summer break in El Centro in 1950. The school newspaper’s photo of Tirebiter was accompanied by the eulogy:

“Gone to heaven, where he will have cushion rides for breakfast, white sidewalls for lunch, and cold rubber recaps for dinner. . . .”

Tirebiter, we’re sad to say, didn’t live long enough to see the advent of radials.

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Hobo salute: The widow of singer Roger Miller, who wrote and sang “King of the Road,” has donated 14 boxes of his clothing and shoes to the National Hobo Assn. The NHA, we’re proud to say, is based in L.A.

Five boxes of his duds were passed out at a tribute to Miller in Colton, which is a hobo shrine because it marks the intersection of the Santa Fe, Southern Pacific and Union Pacific railroads. “I got me a pair of thermal underwear and a pair of Dockers,” said Larry Ratliff, a Vancouver, Wash., hobo. “I ain’t never had a pair of Dockers,” added Ratliff, 31.

He said that he planned to hop a train bound for Yuma, Ariz., explaining: “It’s great. You can ride 400 miles and you don’t have to stay awake. I could hitchhike, but then I’d have to keep the driver awake.”

Unfortunately, he was gone before anyone thought of asking him if he knew where Santa Clarita is.

miscelLAny:

A store called Name That Toon in West Hollywood has opened what is believed to be the world’s first Gumby museum. The clay animation star has a room--Gumby World--devoted to himself and, of course, his parents, Gumbo and Gumba.