He Has Looked His Enemy in the Eye, There in Mirror

Heavyweight champion Riddick Bowe, 33-0 after overwhelming Michael Dokes, doesn’t foresee much competition as he attempts to improve upon the record of Rocky Marciano, who retired in 1955 with a record of 49-0.

“There are only three legitimate challengers to me,” Bowe told the Boston Globe. “One’s incarcerated (Mike Tyson). One’s running scared (World Boxing Council champion Lennox Lewis). One I already beat (Evander Holyfield).

“The way I see it, the only one who can beat me is me.”

*

Trivia time: Identify the eight active NBA players who have scored 10,000 points but have never been chosen to play in an All-Star game.

*

Not making grade: Assigning the Lakers a grade of C-minus for their work before the All-Star break, Corky Meinecke of the Sporting News said of the team’s struggles: “He’s not Worthy, he’s not Worthy.”

*

Fat farm: Of the Clippers, who were given a C, Meinecke wrote: “Getting closer to Calorie Cap.”

*

Medical marvel: From Blackie Sherrod of the Dallas Morning News: “My hope for Nolan Ryan after he hangs up spikes next year: Go to Harvard med school. Not to study, to be studied.”

*

Competitive ways: Bono Hewson, lead singer of the rock band U2, told Rolling Stone magazine that he used to be an avid chess player: “That’s something I’ve never admitted to because it was always so uncool to be a chess player. It’s the most un-rock ‘n’ roll thing you could do, so I never ever talked about it, but that was actually my obsession before rock ‘n’ roll.”

*

Use your illusion: Said Al Iafrate of the Washington Capitals, no fan of the music that is played before games at the Capital Centre: “That’s the reason we always come out slowly in games. The Caps won’t let me play my kind of music over the P.A.--Guns ‘N Roses.”

*

Aren’t we all? Wrote Dave Kindred of the Sporting News: “Remember Roseanne Arnold? She scream-sings in a ballpark while clutching her crotch and is cooked to a crisp by everyone, even the first baseman in the White House. But when Michael Jackson scream-sings in a ballpark while clutching his crotch, everyone thanks him for saving the children. I’m confused.”

*

Out of their league: When his friend, Richie Adubato, was fired as coach of the Dallas Mavericks, Kentucky Coach Rick Pitino said that the Mavericks were not only a team without NBA talent, they weren’t even a team with CBA talent.

Interesting point, thought the Boston Globe, which found that the roster of the CBA’s Oklahoma City Cavalry includes four former first-round NBA draft choices--Michael Smith, Mitchell Wiggins, William Bedford and Dudley Bradley--while the roster of Mavericks includes only three--Derek Harper, Doug Smith and Randy White.

*

N. Error: The NBA’s first batch of All-Star ballots this season listed the Orlando Magic center as “S. O’Neil.”

It’s S. O’Neal, with an a . He was a starter in Sunday’s game.

*

Trivia answer: Eddie Johnson of the Seattle SuperSonics, James Edwards of the Lakers, Orlando Woolridge of the Detroit Pistons, Byron Scott of the Lakers, Herb Williams of the New York Knicks, Mike Gminski of the Charlotte Hornets, Thurl Bailey of the Minnesota Timberwolves and Derek Harper of the Dallas Mavericks.

*

Quotebook: Notre Dame football Coach Lou Holtz, asked by a spectator last week during the Bob Hope Chrysler Classic why the Irish won’t play in the Disneyland Pigskin Classic: “Because they won’t let us play Wabash College.”