They’re Lucky They Haven’t Gone Bananas

Co-skippers Peter Blake and Robin Knox-Johnston of ENZA New Zealand, a giant catamaran that is competing with France’s Commodore Explorer as they try to sail around the world in 80 days, are sponsored by an apple and pear exporter.

Recently, they were asked during a live interview on French television: “After three weeks, do you have (enough) apples and pears so that you don’t miss the girls?”

Replied Knox-Johnson: “With due deference to our sponsors, I don’t think all the world’s supply of apples and pears would be sufficient to make us not miss the girls.”

*

Trivia time: Which Pacific 10 Conference schools have played in the Final Four?

*

That’s about right: From Michael Wilbon of the Washington Post: “Excuse me for wondering what the Lakers are doing, but Benoit Benjamin? Jerry West called him ‘a proven NBA player with solid numbers.’ Proven as what? One of the biggest underachievers in the league?”

*

High hard one: From Newsweek magazine: “The first pitch on opening day for baseball’s New York Mets will definitely be a beanball. Team co-owner Nelson Doubleday has invited deposed baseball commissioner Fay Vincent to toss out the first ball April 5 at Shea Stadium--as a way to both honor Vincent and kick dirt on the shoes of team owners who--unlike Doubleday--voted to dump Vincent last summer.”

*

Shine on: Tony Kornheiser of the Washington Post, on the car Dale Jarrett drove while winning the Daytona 500: “I have seen cars painted some ugly shades of green in my life, and nothing compares with the Interstate Battery radioactive puke green. That thing looked like it came from the Earl Scheib in Chernobyl.”

*

New kid on the block: An Orlando Magic jersey worn and signed by Shaquille O’Neal, who has played in less than a season’s worth of NBA games, was sold at auction last weekend in Salt Lake City for $55,000.

A jersey worn and signed by Michael Jordan brought $25,000.

*

Too much lip: Demetrius Maltie of Anaheim Magnolia High was given a technical foul during a game against Anaheim Western after he kissed Western forward John Cook on the cheek.

“I did it for intimidation, to frustrate him,” Maltie said.

Maltie, who was surprised that anybody noticed, added: “I looked all around for (the officials). I don’t know how they caught me.”

*

Trouble at Troy? Included among the highly regarded football recruiting class signed by Stanford this month was Charles Young, a 5-foot-11, 180-pound wide receiver and son of Charle Young, who played under Stanford Coach Bill Walsh with the San Francisco 49ers at the end of his career.

Wrote Glenn Dickey of the San Francisco Chronicle: “Interestingly enough, the older Young played for USC but reportedly told Stanford coaches he did not want his son going there. In recent years, USC has not been able to get the quality and quantity of black athletes it once did, and there have been rumors that black athletes do not get the support once in school that they did in the past.”

*

Trivia answer: All but Arizona State.

*

Quotebook: Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle: “Trying to teach sensitivity to Marge Schott is like trying to teach typing to Schottzie 02.”