English Kick Soccer Team After Loss

They take their soccer seriously in England. After losing to Norway, 2-0, and apparently dimming hopes of getting into the World Cup, the front page headline in the London Daily Star didn’t hold anything back:

“End of the World,” was the startling message.

“Out-classed, Out-witted and Probably Out of the World Cup,” said Today.

And those were some of the kinder verdicts.

The Daily Mirror accused the team of “lifeless incompetence,” while England’s fans at the game chanted their own lament: “We’re so bad, it’s unbelievable.’

Trivia time: Who holds the NBA playoff record for most steals in a seven-game series?

Is it true?: Columnist Art Spander of the San Francisco Examiner commenting on the Kings playing for the Stanley Cup:

“A team from California playing for the championship of hockey? The next thing you know, the Dodgers will be picking up ground balls.

“When I lived in Los Angeles, everybody thought the ‘red line’ was Communist propaganda and ‘icing’ was something on a birthday cake.”

Battle of the sexes: Jockeys engaging in a fight after a race isn’t surprising news, but when it’s a brawl between a man and woman, well. . . .

Dodie Duys, 33, jumped Carl Gambardella, 53, as they headed to the locker rooms after last Monday’s 13th race at Suffolk Downs in Boston.

A few minutes later, they battled again in the women’s locker room. Duys said Gambardella attacked her in the shower. Gambardella said he stepped into the locker room to find out why Duys had punched him earlier and that she attacked him again.

However, by Wednesday the participants--each 5 feet 3 and 112 pounds--were friends again even though they have been suspended for 15 days.

Heavy stuff: A media memo reads that World Boxing Council heavyweight champion Lennox Lewis will be available for an interview Monday in Las Vegas.

The release also said that Lennox “will discuss his recent hand surgery and the state of the British monarchy.”

Hand surgery before monarchy?

Sure you do: Jose Canseco on his Texas Ranger slugging teammate Juan Gonzalez: “We don’t talk about baseball. We talk about world problems, economics, Japanese art, Korean art. There are a lot of things you don’t know about us.”

Dilemma: Cincinnati Manager Davey Johnson, who returned to Shea Stadium one day before the third anniversary of his being fired by the New York Mets, visited with Met Manager Dallas Green.

“I didn’t know whether to congratulate him or offer condolences,” Johnson said.

Trivia answer: John Stockton of the Utah Jazz, 28 against the Lakers in 1988.

Quotebook: Boston Celtic forward Kevin McHale after announcing his retirement: “People always ask me what it felt like to play second fiddle to Larry Bird. I say it’s still a pretty mean second fiddle, because he was the best.”