WORLD SERIES : Toronto Blue Jays vs. Philadelphia Phillies : Seriously, Folks, It’s Blue Jays : Game 1: Toronto toys with Philadelphia in opener, 8-5. White, Olerud and Alomar get the big hits.

The Philadelphia Phillie comedy shop was closed Saturday night. There were no skits or gags. No blaring music. Why, not even John Kruk had anything amusing to offer.

The Toronto Blue Jays, who have this annoying habit of draining the personality out of every organization that dares to challenge them, have done it again.

The Blue Jays, methodically pounding away with a lineup that belongs in All-Star games, silenced the Phillies, 8-5, in Game 1 of the World Series in front of 52,011 fans at the SkyDome.

Their offensive procession was so complete, so thoroughly powerful, that the Phillies were absolutely demoralized. The Blue Jays got 10 hits, produced solo homers from John Olerud and Devon White, and had either a hit or run batted in by everyone in the lineup.

The Phillies went through four pitchers trying to stop the attack, but it wasn’t until the eighth inning that they were even able to record a 1-2-3 inning. It was enough to make them, well, almost speechless.

“Hell, yes, we’re (teed) off,” Phillie bullpen stopper Mitch Williams said. “I think a lot of people have the wrong idea about us. They think for some crazy reason that we’re just happy to be in the World Series.

“Hey, second place don’t mean nothing. That’s why you didn’t see me celebrate when we won the pennant. I didn’t squirt champagne on nobody, or even drink any of it.

“To me, all we got is an invitation to the dance.

“We still have to dance.”

The Blue Jays teased the Phillies for five innings, toying with their emotions at times. Why, three different times they gave the Phillies the lead. Three different times they took it away.

“You can’t do that and expect to beat a team like that,” said Phillie starter Curt Schilling, who yielded eight hits and six earned runs in 6 1/3 innings. “I didn’t do my job, and unfortunately, the whole team had to pay for it.”

The most aggravating aspect of the whole ordeal for the Phillies was that they were able to knock Blue Jay starter Juan Guzman out of the game in only five innings. Guzman game up five hits, four walks and four runs, and had thrown 120 pitches when he was removed from the game.

Enter Al Leiter, who at one time was billed as the next Ron Guidry, but was discarded four years ago by the New York Yankees. He grew up in New Jersey, but was a die-hard Phillie fan ever since he saw Mike Schmidt.

“My dream was to pitch in the World Series one day for the Phillies,” said Leiter, who pitched 2 2/3 scoreless innings for the victory. “I can’t believe after all these years, here I was facing my favorite team.”

The biggest moment in Leiter’s career came in the sixth inning. The score was tied at 4-4, and Leiter was in trouble. The Phillies loaded the bases, after Blue Jay second baseman Roberto Alomar saved a run with his diving stab of Mariano Duncan’s grounder, and Kruk was at the plate.

Kruk, sweating profusely stared at Leiter. He remembered him from spring training when they were playing in front of 8,000 people, but now the world was watching.

“I tried to play mind games with myself to make believe that I was back in Clearwater pitching,” Leiter said. “I tried as best I could to not think about the situation I was in.”

They battled back and forth until it reached a full count. Leiter had no choice but to throw his best pitch, and Kruk knew it was coming. Leiter, pitching from a full windup, threw a fastball with all his might. Kruk swung . . . and missed.

Kruk flung his helmet, then his bat toward the dugout in disgust, mumbling all the way to first base. It was over. The Blue Jays were done toying with his motley bunch, and they put them away for good.

First baseman John Olerud gave Toronto the lead with a sixth-inning homer in the second deck off Schilling. Rickey Henderson drove Schilling out of the game in the seventh with his single. White, who went two for four and scored three runs, greeted David West with a double for one run. Alomar hit another double for two more runs.

Just like that, the Blue Jays had an 8-4 lead, leaving the Phillies to wonder how in the world they will shut down this team.

‘What people don’t realize is that we’re a much better team this year than last year,” said Blue Jay reliever Duane Ward, who pitched 1 1/3 innings for the save. “I feel kind of guilty getting all these saves. I mean, we score five, six, seven runs a game.

“The best job in America, well, I guess I should say, Canada, is pitching for these guys.

Said outfielder Joe Carter: “You look at this lineup, and it’s an All-Star game every time we play. There hasn’t been a team to stop us yet. I really don’t know if it’s possible.”

If the Blue Jays needed any help, the Phillie defense certainly provided comic relief. They played defense on this night as if they were on Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras. There was catcher Darren Daulton allowing Schilling’s second-inning pitch to squirt by him for a passed ball, and an inning later, left fielder Milt Thompson and center fielder Lenny Dykstra running into each other on White’s fly ball, enabling him to reach third.

It was enough to wonder, well, if the Phillies really belong here.

“We’ve made a lot of people look foolish by counting us out,” Williams said. “I mean, we’re all castoffs. Except for Darren Daulton, nobody wanted us.

“We’ve all got people in our past we want to prove wrong.

“Believe me, we get a sick pleasure in proving people wrong.

“And anybody can tell you that we are sick people.”