It Didn’t Pay to Challenge His Accusers

Remember the lawsuit filed by amateur golfer John Buckingham in Nottingham, England, against two fellow club members who accused him of cheating?

Well, Buckingham, 57, lost the suit and must pay legal costs estimated at $375,000.

But, the jury’s forewoman stressed in a note, the verdict should not be perceived as proof that Buckingham had cheated.

Not even a little?

Trivia time: Who are the only female jockeys to have ridden in the Kentucky Derby?

Speed limits: Montreal Expo outfielder Larry Walker, on his team’s pitching staff: “We’ve got one guy (Pedro Martinez) who weighs 50 pounds and throws 180 m.p.h., and another guy (Denis Boucher) who weighs 180 pounds and throws 50 m.p.h.”

Ugh!A recent Morning Briefing item told of Cracker Jack being replaced by Crunch ‘n Munch at Busch Stadium in St. Louis.

So reader Gregory R. Rutter offered this variation of the famous baseball song:

“Take me out to the ballgame,

“Take me out with the crowd.

“Buy me some peanuts and Crunch ‘n Munch,

“It’s bad enough to make you lose your lunch!”

Here’s Howard: Ed Goren, the Fox television sports executive producer, on former Dallas Cowboy coach Jimmy Johnson, who will be a studio analyst for the network next fall:

“I think there is a touch of Cosell here. People will watch Jimmy either because they never did like him, or because he’s the greatest thing they’ve ever seen.

“I’m sure people will be throwing bricks. Cosell could have been reading the Bible and they’d throw bricks.”

Slap shot: Bernie Miklasz of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch chided the Blues, who were eliminated in four games by the Dallas Stars in an NHL Western Conference quarterfinal series, calling them “as soft and pretty as Nancy Kerrigan.”

Another career?Alan Greenberg of the Hartford Courant wrote that if he had the first pick in last Sunday’s NFL draft, he would have chosen Michael Jordan.

“Why not? If he’s not going to play any more basketball, he’s free once the minor league baseball season ends. Assuming the White Sox don’t call him up for the September stretch drive, you bring in Jordan as a sixth defensive back or third wide receiver, maybe stick him under the crossbar to block field goals.”

Tongue twister: From the California spring football prospectus: “The loss of top receiver Mike Caldwell to graduation creates an opportunity for the talented Iheanyl Uwaezuoke to make a name for himself.”

Commented Tom FitzGerald of the San Francisco Chronicle: “And, yes, his teammates do refer to him as ‘Eye Chart.’ ”

FYI: From Baseball America magazine: The three leading colleges in producing current major leaguers are UCLA, 11; Stanford and Arizona State, 10 each.

Trivia answer: Diane Crump, 1970; Patricia Cooksey, 1984; Andrea Seefeldt, 1991, and Julie Krone, 1992.

Quotebook: Eric Hillman, New York Met pitcher: “Owning a Mercedes station wagon is like having a Rolex alarm clock.”