12 Ways to End the Baseball Strike

1. Force the owners to watch an entire game between replacement players. . . .

2. Bring in former President Carter as mediator. . . .

3. Let the striking players work $5-an-hour jobs in the real world. . . .

4. Make Lenny Dykstra the union negotiator. . . .

5. As suggested by Newt Gingrich, have both sides watch “Field of Dreams.” . .

6. Better yet, have them watch “Greedy.” . .

7. Move the 26 other teams to Canada. . . .

8. Have both sides look up the word compromise in the dictionary. . . .

9. Send Donald Fehr to a Dale Carnegie seminar. . . .

10. Let Ernie Banks decide what to do. . . .

11. Have Chris Chelios make some threats. . . .

12. Bring common sense to the table for the first time. . . .