DeShields Finally Pain-Free and Ready : Baseball: Dodger second baseman excited about leadoff prospects after a very trying first season in L.A.

Dodger second baseman Delino DeShields stared vacantly ahead, shut his eyes, and allowed himself to revisit the feeling that once threatened his sanity.

No one knew the pain he felt last year. There were nights he couldn’t sleep. Days he couldn’t eat. Life had become almost unbearable.

Finally, one night after a game in Philadelphia last July, DeShields decided to confide in someone. He told his family and closest friends of his misery--the shooting pains in his left leg, his waning confidence, his loneliness.

“That’s when I almost packed it in,” DeShields said. “I was thinking about quitting, and saying, ‘I had enough of ya’ll. That’s it. I’m out of here. Maybe I’ll see you next year.’

“I started praying about it, listened to what my family and friends were saying, and decided to stick it out.

“But physically, mentally, emotionally, it was the worst.”

It began, he said, when he was traded Nov. 19, 1993, by Montreal to the Dodgers for Pedro Martinez. Suddenly, he was questioning his ability.

Then two weeks into spring training, teammate Mike Busch let go of a bat that broke DeShields’ cheekbone. In April, he crashed into outfielder Raul Mondesi in the outfield and suffered a concussion. In May, he slid into Chicago Cub catcher Rick Wilkins, sliced open a finger on his left hand, and was put on the disabled list.

In June, the pains in his left leg got worse. In July, he considered going home. In August, baseball went on strike. In September, the season was canceled, and DeShields immediately headed for surgery.

“I knew something was really wrong because that pain wasn’t going away,” he said. “It was going all the way up into my hip. I really thought it might be the end of my career.”

Doctors found a bone spur in his left heel that was causing nerve damage. He went in for surgery, spent 2 1/2 months recovering, hit the batting cages three times a week with teammate Mike Piazza, and arrived at camp Thursday morning looking like the Delino DeShields everyone remembered from Montreal.

“He’s the guy we were all waiting to see,” hitting coach Reggie Smith said. “He wasn’t himself all last year, and I knew that. But now I wanted to see for myself if there was a change in him.

“Geez, as soon as he walked in, you could see the difference right away. His confidence was back. He’s healthy. He’s happy.”

DeShields, 26, considered one of the league’s most talented second basemen, realizes the Dodgers need him more than ever this season. Now that Brett Butler is gone, DeShields inherits the leadoff role. And if he struggles, the Dodgers will suffer.

“I feel at peace with myself again,” DeShields said. “I’m healthy again. I’m not worrying whether my career is over. And the trade is behind me.

“I’m going to show people what I can really do, because they sure didn’t see it last year.

“It was like I doubted myself from the start, wondering why Montreal traded me, thinking that maybe my skills were going. Then I started having all those injuries, and that pain in my leg was getting bad.

“I started saying, ‘Just operate on me. Fix me. Cut out my brain if you have to, but just get me back.’

“Well, I’m back.”

DeShields, who batted only .250 last year--he hit .171 batting leadoff--can ill afford that this season if the Dodgers are to remain competitive. Yet, if you listen to Smith, he is convinced that DeShields may turn out to be a more proficient leadoff hitter than Butler. DeShields has more power. He has more speed. And last year, he even led the league in taking pitches.

“He’s much better equipped for that role now,” Smith said. “You could see it today (in) batting practice. He’s got that quickness and strength back.

“But most important, he’s free of mind. He doesn’t have to sit and wonder whether his injury was career ending. He can finally just play.”

Said Piazza, DeShields’ closest friend on the team, “We’re all excited to get going again, but I don’t know if anyone is more than Delino.”

DeShields, the Dodgers’ highest-paid position player at $3 million, could find himself in an enviable situation in the fall, when he will be eligible for free agency. Yet, he says, it’s no time to talk about the future. It’s time to prove himself, and demonstrate to the Dodgers that their deal with Montreal was one they will forever savor.

“I know it was a big trade,” he said. “And it was a good trade. I really believe that.

“And you know what?

“I’m going to have the last laugh.”

*

Dodger Notes

The Dodgers will offer arbitration today to pitcher Ramon Martinez, who earned $2.6 million last season, but said they still will try to sign him to a contract, perhaps a multiyear deal. . . . Veteran outfielders Chris Gwynn and Mitch Webster, two of the Dodgers’ most productive pinch-hitters, agreed to accept triple-A contracts but will be invited to the major league camp.

Arbitration was not offered to third baseman Dave Hansen and catcher Carlos Hernandez, who instead were offered one-year contracts for about $300,000 apiece. They are expected to accept the deals rather than try free agency. . . . Relief pitcher Todd Worrell was the only player absent who didn’t have visa problems. “Maybe it’s tough to get out of Missouri,” Executive Vice President Fred Claire said. Worrell was scheduled to be in camp today for the first mandatory workout. . . . Outfielder Raul Mondesi, the National League’s rookie of the year last season, also is expected today.