Weekend Escape: San Francisco : Frisco Kid : On foot and by bus, a mom treats her preteen to a frugal, youth-accented tour of The City

Everyone knows that San Francisco is the hot toddy of romantic California cities, and yet here I am playing laser tag and exploring cellblocks with my 12-year-old son Eric.

We’re spending a long weekend checking out the preteen side of the city. To be successful, I have to select venues that will prevent my “Beavis and Butt-head” addict’s eyes from glazing over: Alcatraz, the Exploratorium, the aquarium and Ripley’s “Believe It or Not!”

I’ll race him in bumper cars and shock him with a borderline-bawdy matinee of “Beach Blanket Babylon.” Fisherman’s Wharf, Japantown, Chinatown--we’re gonna work this town. Just to add to the challenge, we’re doing it on a budget. Less than $700 for four days in one of the most expensive cities in the United States.

Flying from Orange County to Oakland instead of into San Francisco cut the air fare down to $144, a “friends fly free” fare on Southwest Airlines. And we used the Bay Area’s public transportation system: With carry-on luggage in hand, we jumped on the Air BART shuttle outside the airport ($2 each), rode to the Coliseum BART station, transferred to the Daly City-bound train ($2.15 each), and got off at the Civic Center station. From there, we walked a few blocks to Van Ness Avenue and caught the No. 42 bus to Lombard Street ($1.35 total).

In less than 90 minutes we had arrived at our hotel, the Comfort Inn by the Bay. This 11-story bargain is five blocks from Fisherman’s Wharf, with a bus stop at the front door, complimentary breakfasts and a view of the Golden Gate Bridge from our attractive room ($69 a night for two double beds using the Entertainment Card, or $79 by booking through discounter San Francisco Reservations, 800-677-1550).

We dropped off our luggage and walked to Ghirardelli Square for a traditional taste of San Francisco: sourdough sandwiches and hot chocolates at Boudin Sourdough Bakery & Cafe ($9.66). Down the street at the Cannery, we played an interactive war game ($7 each for 20 minutes) at Q-Zar, strapping on plastic vests and arming ourselves with laser guns. The battlefield was a dark, eerie maze with a throbbing sound system that would have bothered Eddie Van Halen’s eardrums. Eric, of course, loved it.

Outside in the real world, we wangled our way past the street vendors to reach Jefferson and Taylor streets. This is Kid Central, with candy shops, souvenir stores and campy attractions, such as the Haunted Gold Mine and the Wax Museum (a waxy O.J. out front turned us off).

Our destination was the neon-decorated Ripley’s “Believe It or Not!” ($7.95 total, using the Entertainment Book coupon). I expected to be bored by this odditorium, but we spent an hour staring at the collection of nature’s mishaps (a two-headed calf) and hoaxes (a “Fiji Island mermaid” was really the head and torso of a monkey sewn to the bottom half of a fish).

A block away at Pier 41, we boarded a Red & White Fleet ferry to Alcatraz ($22; order in advance by calling 415-546-2700). I thought a prison tour would send a powerful message to my son--sort of a mild “Scared Straight” for good kids. But the former federal penitentiary failed to make a negative impression on Eric, who saw the basketball courts and concluded, “How bad could it be?”

At Pier 30, there were three giant video arcades, bumper cars and Turbo Ride, a motion simulation theater in which hydraulic seats move in sync with the images on the 70-millimeter screen.

We bought tickets to two shows ($17 total): “Dino Island”--a cuddly “Jurassic Park”--and “RoboCop: The Ride,” where we maneuvered the Detroit streets on virtual-reality motorcycles. *

By Sunday morning I was on arcade overload, so we took off on foot to Van Ness Avenue and California Street to board a cable car for a roller-coaster ride to Chinatown ($4 total). In one of the large bazaars, Eric bought iron balls with the Taoist symbol of yin yang painted on them. At Union Square we ate at the bustling Sears Fine Foods, where the smell of syrup penetrates the air because everyone, regardless of the time of day, orders the Swedish pancakes, French toast or waffles. In the afternoon we were off to North Beach for the matinee performance of “Beach Blanket Babylon,” the madcap revue that has run at the Club Fugazi on Columbus Avenue for 21 years ($54 for two front-balcony tickets; people under 21 are only allowed at the Sunday matinee, when no alcohol is served). “BBB” pokes fun at pop culture: A Madonna look-alike in a cone bra flew over the audience, there was a Kato cameo, and a singer staggering under a towering city-skyline headdress ended the wiggy show.

On Monday, we took the bus to the Presidio to see Ft. Point, a Civil-War era brick fortress built by the Army Corps of Engineers that lies in the shadow of the Golden Gate Bridge. (Visit Wednesday through Sunday when the National Park Service shows a short film on the fort.)

After jumping aboard the No. 28 bus to Golden Gate Park, we visited the California Academy of Sciences, home to the aquarium, planetarium and Natural History Museum. (By showing our bus transfer, we got a $2 discount off the $8.50 admission fee.) We spent hours inside the expansive old building and, after lunch at the inside cafe ($14.92), began a long trek through the park to Haight Street. We walked past Alamo Square and its bordering Victorian row houses, and ended up in Japantown for tasty tempura-and-teriyaki-steak dinners at Sanppo on Post Street ($24.34 with tip). Eric tried wasabi on his crab hand-roll and didn’t flinch at the green horseradish’s bite.

On Tuesday morning, we visited the Exploratorium, a hands-on, mad scientist’s center at the Palace of Fine Arts ($8.50 adult, $4.50 children 6-17). Eric pulled handles, pushed levers, twisted gizmos and peered through magnifying glasses in the name of science. The best part was watching children patiently coach their parents through the 700 exhibits.

With our brains in high gear, we walked to Lombard Street to have burgers, fries and milkshakes at the ‘50s-style Mel’s, then hiked a long way to Lombard’s famous squiggly section: the eight hairpin curves in one block between Hyde and Leavenworth. We passed tourists waiting in idling cars to test their steering ability down the zigzagging one-way street. Tackling it on foot was much more fun, and the best views of the city are here. (Beginning Tuesday, Lombard will close to automobile traffic only for a 100-day refurbishment project.)

Eric now says he wants to go to college in the Bay Area. Hearing that made all those hours in arcades seem worth it.

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Budget for Two

Comfort Inn: $231.84

Air fare: 144.00

Public transportation: 27.35

Lunches: 62.97

Dinners: 83.79

Entertainment: 140.45

FINAL TAB: $690.40

Comfort Inn by the Bay, 2775 Van Ness Ave., San Francisco, CA 94109-1497; telephone (415) 928-5000 or (800) 221-2222. For Entertainment Books with discount coupons for Bay Area attractions, tel. (800) 374-4464. The San Francisco Visitor Information Center has free guidebooks and maps, tel. (415) 391-2000.