MOVIE REVIEW : ‘Bed of Roses’ Could Use a Few Thorns

Keeping things short and sweet is often good advice, and when they are as sweet as writer-director Michael Goldenberg’s “Bed of Roses,” the shorter the better.

Goldenberg’s early valentine tells of the whirlwind courtship of Lewis (Christian Slater), an obsessively romantic Lower Manhattan flower shop owner, and Lisa (Mary Stuart Masterson), an investment broker with a scarred psyche, and of the hurdles that reality puts in the way of their fairy-tale romance.

Those hurdles are more like tiny little speed bumps in “Bed of Roses.” For all the insinuated angst and complications, there isn’t a nanosecond of doubt about the outcome of this relationship. A fairy tale it is, with a prince of a guy coming to the rescue of his dream girl, with a pretty good shot at living happily ever after.

The good news is that Slater and Masterson are amiable company for 90 minutes of fantasy. Slater, playing opposite Marisa Tomei in “Untamed Heart” and Patricia Arquette in “True Romance,” has become something of a modern romantic ideal--sensitive, focused, vulnerable, committed, passionate. Mr. Right for the New Monogamy.

In “Bed of Roses,” he is Mr. Too Perfect, a reformed Wall Street hustler who, after his wife and baby died in childbirth, decided not only to stop and smell the roses, but to sell and deliver them. There is no greater joy than the look on the face of someone to whom you have just handed a bouquet of flowers, Lewis says, and occasionally, he even delivers them when they haven’t been ordered.

It is one of those occasions that brings him together with Lisa. While walking through his neighborhood late one night, he spots the young woman weeping at the window of her apartment and tries to cheer her up the next day by delivering an anonymous bouquet to her office. She responds by hounding him for the name of the sender, and when he finally fesses up, they fall instantly in love.

The complication here is that Lisa had a childhood so painful she can’t discuss it with anyone, least of all this dreamboat with a rooftop garden and a penchant for groveling devotion. The mere thought of a normal relationship, with potential in-laws and holiday get-togethers, gives her a panic attack, and because of her childhood experiences, she cannot deal with either his naive faith in romantic perfection or his smothering attention.

Masterson is a versatile actress, and there is an engaging honesty about her performance. But Lisa’s mysterious past, when it is revealed, comes off as pure invention, the stuff of a writer’s overheated imagination. When Lewis asks her when her birthday is, she seems flummoxed and pulls a date out of thin air. It’s believable that she wouldn’t know; it’s not believable she hadn’t had to come up with the answer before. As far as we can tell, Lisa went directly from tragic childhood to promising financial career without having lived in between.

The film’s symbol is the sterling silver rose, whose delicate silver-pink pedals and lack of thorns is “too much perfection” for Lisa, and a model to emulate for Lewis. The flower is gorgeous, and the entire movie is a veritable bouquet to New York. But Lisa’s right. In the end, “Bed of Roses” is too much perfection.

* MPAA rating: PG, for mild language and thematic elements. Times guidelines: Some good sex apparently takes place off camera.

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‘Bed of Roses’

Christian Slater: Lewis

Mary Stuart Masterson: Lisa

Pamela Segall: Kim

Josh Brolin: Danny

Brian Tarantina: Randy

A Mindel/Shaw Production. Released by New Line. Written and directed by Michael Goldenberg. Producers Allan Mindel and Denise Shaw. Photography by Adam Kimmel. Music by Michael Convertino. Editor Jane Kurson. Costumes by Cynthia Flynt. Production designer Stephen McCabe. Art director Jefferson Sage. Running time: 1 hour, 30 minutes.

* In general release throughout Southern California.