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R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Final Four Is What It Means to Them

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John Eisenberg in the Baltimore Sun: “The Final Four’s theme this year is ‘I Don’t Get No Respect.’

“Take Mississippi State. The Bulldogs are claiming gross disrespect because they were the only ones who thought they could reach the Final Four.

“Well, they’re right, they were the only ones. But was that such an injustice? What had they ever done other than bark and roll over in the tournament?

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“I’ll gladly give them my respect now that they have earned it, but was I so horribly wrong not to believe in them?”

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Trivia time: Which school has lost the most NCAA championship basketball games?

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Out of his league: Veteran boxing trainer Eddie Futch, asked by Esquire’s Mark Kram if he rated Mike Tyson among his five all-time heavyweights:

“No. [Joe] Louis had too much in either hand for Mike--short, deadly combinations that shake you to your shoes.

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“With [Muhammad] Ali, Mike wouldn’t hit him with a hand grenade. Jersey Joe Walcott would have been too smart for him. [Sonny] Liston was too big and powerful and had a jarring jab. Rocky [Marciano] would be hit, that’s for sure, but Mike would see violence, in spades.”

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Dubious record: The New York Islanders’ Pat Conacher, with his seventh team in 13 years, is the only player who has played for the three New York-area teams, the Rangers, New Jersey Devils and Islanders.

“I don’t know if I should be proud of that or not,” he said. “It’s the only record I hold in the NHL, that’s for sure.”

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Night flyer: Golfer Laura Davies, who is competing in the Nabisco Dinah Shore tournament this week, told Tom Tyers of the Arizona Republic that her favorite tournament is Germany’s Hennessy Cup. It’s not because of the prize money, but because the autobahns have no speed limit.

“I usually leave the course there, eat something, then drive up and down the autobahns at night,” Davies said, adding that she hit 161 mph in her BMW 850Csi.

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Returning fire: San Francisco right fielder Glenallen Hill has a novel idea on stopping pitchers from throwing at batters.

“I think if hitters were allowed to throw their bats at the pitcher once each at-bat, the pitchers might begin to understand,” he said.

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Not fast enough: Would-be St. Louis Cardinal relief pitcher Gregg Olson, lamenting the loss of his curveball: “There’s only about two or three guys who can get by with only fastballs in this game. And I’m not one of them.”

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Trivia answer: Duke, five times.

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Quotebook: Utah Coach Rick Majerus, after Kentucky defeated the Utes in the Midwest Regional semifinals, 101-70: “I knew what Kentucky was going in and I know even more going out. I’m really shellshocked. I’m punch-drunk and pretty soon I’m going to be drunk, and I’m not even a drinking guy. I’m just worn out.”

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