Real Name of the Game Is Money

David Warner agreed to sell a car for his sister, not knowing he would acquire a pseudonym.

“I told her I would ask for $950 or the best offer,” he said. “So I put ‘$950 obo’ on the sign--that’s all that would fit on it. Later, I’m getting out of the shower and my brother says someone called about the car asking for Obo. I didn’t think much of it at the time. When I met with the man, he said, ‘Are you Obo?’ I said, ‘Well, yes, I guess I am,’ and sold him the car for $900.”

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ATTENTION, SCROOGES: Or perhaps I should say Bob Cratchits. Bruce Peterson of El Segundo noticed a marquee that seemed directed toward disgruntled employees (see photo).

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HE’S NO OBO: Outgoing MTA board member Nick Patsaouras, who has a plaza named after him outside the MTA’s downtown headquarters, received this tribute from county Supervisor Zev Yaroslavsky: “Other than Thaddeus Kosciuszko Way [a downtown street named after the Polish Revolutionary War hero], the Patsaouras Plaza is the most difficult sign on any street in Los Angeles.”

Yaroslavsky knows about pronunciation problems, having once been introduced at a Lakers championship rally by broadcaster Chick Hearn as Zev “Zevalosky.”

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A KIND OF PURITY: Vince Rojas of Granada Hills spotted a flier for those who insist on the “real” thing for Christmas--in this case, “real” plastic (see accompanying).

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ANGELENOS ABROAD: Jerry Lench of North Hills, speaking of the difference between English and American road signs, says: “I like their ‘Squeeze’ better than our ‘Merging Traffic.’ Where we say ‘Yield,’ they say, ‘Give Way.’ And I prefer their ‘Slow Down Now’ better than our ‘Speed Zone Ahead,’ which has always struck me as an invitation to speed.”

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GUFFAWING POSTAL: Paul Sislin of L.A. sent along a piece of junk mail that his wife received at her post office box, informing her that she had become eligible to receive $100,000 “when your loan . . . was funded on your home located at P.O. Box-----.” She wasn’t inside when the letter was delivered, the P.O. box being pretty full.

Continuing mail call. . . . Betty Deutsch Arias recalled that when her father, Lester L. Deutsch, was a hospital administrator in Inglewood, he would always sign “Adm.” after his name on business letters. Naturally, he received a letter one day addressed to “Admiral” Deutsch.

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ANCIENT PROBLEMS: The new Getty Center has been called “L.A.’s Acropolis” by some critics. Hey, let’s not jinx the museum. Places with imported ancient names in Southern California haven’t been faring so well lately. The Lakers and Kings, for instance, say they’re leaving the Forum. The Rams and Raiders long ago deserted the Coliseum.

And now I read where only 646 fans showed up to see the StingRay basketball team play at Cal State Long Beach’s Pyramid, prompting rumors the women’s pro outfit may leave the city. The Curse of the Pyramid strikes again.

miscelLAny:

Has Santa Claus been transformed from a symbol of joy to a symbol of apprehension this El Nino season? My 4-year-old son, Jamie, after seeing his dad patching tiles atop our house, asked, “Is Santa going to break our roof?”

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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.