A Deserved Bit of Respite

Most cultures teach reverence for the elderly, but the principle is especially strong in Confucianism, which remains a powerful influence today in many parts of Asia, including Vietnam.

Still, the ideal of respecting the aged sometimes clashes with the reality of tangled personal relationships. So some of the refugees from Vietnam who made their way to Orange County in the past two decades have been rejected by their children or been forced out of their homes for a variety of reasons at a time when they should be enjoying retirement.

This month, a good example of cooperation between the city of Westminster and the nonprofit Asian Senior Citizens Assn. of Westminster resulted in a helping hand for Vietnamese seniors needing temporary shelter.

The association has opened a three-bedroom home where the aged Vietnamese can stay until they find permanent homes. The city spent $30,000 to renovate the building it has owned for years. A community group called Volunteers Exchange oversaw the remodeling. Business owners, many of them Vietnamese, paid for much of the furnishings and will help pay for the upkeep.

Though the house will be able to shelter only four or five people at a time, it will play an important role.

One 85-year-old woman likely to take advantage of the shelter said her children had told her they did not want her to live with them. At times she has gone door to door, visiting friends or acquaintances, seeking a bed for the night.

She painted a painful portrait when she said, “It’s very hard to grow old in this country, especially if you are an immigrant who is too old to drive and who can’t speak English and must depend on your children for everything.”

Besides providing shelter, the house will offer companionship to those in difficult circumstances. They can find people their own age, who have shared many of the same experiences. That sort of common perspective helps unite people regardless of ethnicity.

For immigrants forced to flee their homeland at an age when starting a new life was especially difficult, the association, the city and the volunteers have offered a deserved bit of respite.