Bigger Is Better for Toledo

If Bruin Coach Bob Toledo were a fighter, he’d be Rocky Balboa. Kill or be killed.

If he were a golfer, he’d be John Daly. Long drives, don’t worry about the putts.

If he were a ballplayer, he’d hold the bat down on the handle. Home run or strikeout.

In tennis, he’d be known for his cannonball serve, not for his net play.

In basketball, he’d be putting up three-point shots all night but he’d be a lousy foul shooter.

In hockey, he’d be known for his slap shot from center ice, not his back-checking.

And, in football, he’d rather win, 40-28, than, 7-0. He’d be embarrassed to win, 7-0.

His games are as exciting as going over Niagara Falls in a barrel. They’re Dempsey-Firpo, rumbles in the jungle, dock fights. All offense. No clinching, dancing, jabbing. Swing from the heels. All-out war.

His Bruin footballers have lost two games this season. In one, they scored 34 points.

Now, when you score 34 points in a football game--especially a game against Washington State--you expect to win, probably big. Trouble was, Washington State scored 37 points. Checkmate.

His Bruins scored 24 points in another game. Trouble was, Tennessee scored 30.

Then, his team, an underdog in the betting, played it safe: They scored 66 points in their third game. This time, it was enough. They beat Texas, 66-3.

The next week, they took no chances again: They scored 40 points, and beat Arizona, 40-27.

By then, they realized you can never be too rich. They scored 66 and beat Houston, 66-10.

His teams don’t fall on the ball. They fall on you.

“We were ahead, 35-0, over Houston at the half. And we threw the bomb. For a touchdown,” Toledo reminds you.

He’s not trying to run up the score, he says. It’s just that the Bruins never know when they’ll need another touchdown. Or three.

They take no prisoners out there.

As a result, the alumni--who were beginning to mutter mutinously after the first two defeats--are now walking cocky again. They have the hammer.

Years ago, there was a coach at Ohio State, Francis Schmidt, and they called him “Close the Gates of Mercy” Schmidt because his teams used to win, 70-0.

Toledo’s teams don’t score 60 points to be merciless. They score them because they might need them.

It isn’t that his defense is pusillanimous. Actually, Bruin defenders have forced 17 turnovers in their last three games--and their offense scored on 14 of them.

“We’ve got more turnovers already than we had all last year,” Toledo says. A total of 24 in five games.

Any team that can score 230 points in five games is scary. Texas hasn’t been that shocked since the Alamo fell. When the “Hook ‘em ‘Horns!” come up 63 points short, the whole state is embarrassed. Whatever would Davy Crockett think?

So, this unholy Toledo has the nation’s attention. The unstoppable meets the movable. What kind of team is this he’s siccing on the opposition this season?

Well, first of all, a very fast one. And an unpredictable one. It has balance.

Skip Hicks can run the ball with the best of them--he has 515 yards already, with 15 touchdowns, two by receiving.

Cade McNown can pass the ball with the best of them--he has 90 completions for 1,422 yards and 11 touchdowns. He is left-handed and if you don’t think that upsets cornerbacks, then you’ve forgotten Frankie Albert, Ken Stabler, and McNown’s idol, Steve Young. No fighter likes to fight a left-hander. No linebackers, either. When a guy deals left-handed, fold.

So, this is an explosive team that sometimes forgets to let go of the hand grenade. (It ended the Washington State game on the Cougar one-yard line.)

Toledo was a quarterback in a playing career that included stints at San Jose State, San Jose City College and San Francisco State. He lasted a month with the 49ers.

But, Toledo is as offense-minded as the German general staff. Every game is a blitzkrieg. The defense’s job on Toledo’s team is to go get the ball and give it to the offense. Force errors, intercept, fall on the fumble, block the kick. They’re reckless too.

“We blitz six, seven, eight players,” Toledo admits. “So, we’re vulnerable too.”

He grins. “But, it’s fun, right? After all, we’re in the entertainment business.”

The Bruin general staff in the past was not so apt to raise the ante and call for three cards. Toledo’s teams never say, “I’ll play these.” But the late Red Sanders used to play the single-wing offense (three yards and a cloud of dust) and stress the kicking game. Toledo plays a multiple offense and might not even kick on fourth and long.

For the Bruins, good field position is anywhere they’ve got the ball. They play “red zone” football all over the field. When they’ve gotten the ball in the red zone--inside the 20-yard-line--they have scored 21 of 22 times, 16 touchdowns and five field goals.

Americans love power football--as they love power sports, generally. They love the homer hitters, the guys who drive the par-four greens, the guys who win with aces, on the court or at the table, and score first-round knockouts.

The Bruins have gone from the caboose of the AP poll to 18th on the list, not because they’re 3-2 but because of how they became 3-2. Football fans too, love to chant “We will rock you!” “Hold that line!” doesn’t get it.

Toledo’s Bruins this year are like the guy who comes home all beat up with a black eye, cut lip and bloody nose and, when someone looks shocked, he says, “Yeah, but you should see the other guy!”