City Workers' New Benefit: Family Skills

By LISA RICHARDSON

Sept. 16, 1997 12 AM PT

TIMES STAFF WRITER

GARDEN GROVE —

Saimi Wright thought she was best friends with her daughter.

Then her daughter turned 13.

“I always thought I was really cool,” Wright said. “But suddenly she can’t be seen with me when I drop her off at school.”

Rather than continue to feel rejected, Wright, 41, decided to find some advice. She turned to Family University, a program of books, audiotapes and flashcards that teach family skills. While the U.S. military and major companies such as Price Waterhouse, Sprint, Arthur Andersen and Chrysler have embraced the program, Garden Grove has become the first city in the nation to offer it to its employees.

Like Wright, the city’s senior center director, Garden Grove had been doing some soul-searching about its problems with children.

“We sat down and we looked at the whole issue of youth at risk,” said Marie Knight, manager of the Community Services Department.

In fact, they aren’t having problems different from kids anywhere else.

But the city found that when kids were troubled, “it kept coming back to the family,” Knight said.

The city already was looking for ways to strengthen families when officials saw an advertisement for Family University in the Wall Street Journal.

After years of teaching fathering skills in seminars around the country, originally as Dads University, the company launched its Smart Families/Smart Business initiative in March.

More than 15,000 people have taken Family University courses, and more than a million receive its magazine.

“We recognize the importance of building strong, healthy families, whether it is with our own employees or within the community we serve,” Garden Grove Mayor Bruce Broadwater said.

Garden Grove prides itself on being a leader in employee training and development. The city, for example, has drafted a mission statement for its workers and has offered seminars to its employees based on the book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen R. Covey.

The Family University program fits neatly into Garden Grove’s conservative politics and frugal way of doing business.

Content is not overtly religious but is based on spiritual principles.

The program does not cost the city anything, and employees may pay the $199 fee through payroll deductions.

The program is first being offered to city employees, but workers at any business in town ultimately will be able to enroll.

“When I first saw the program, I thought, ‘What’s going on? Are we trying to impose values on our employees?’ ” Councilman Mark Leyes said. “But it’s all optional, and the employees taking advantage of it seem to find a lot of value in it.

“It’s like dental insurance,” Leyes said. “We offer it because we want our employees to be healthy and happy and productive--and also, we want them to come across that way when they deal with the citizenry.”

There is little research on whether such family self-help programs work, but they probably don’t hurt, said Myron Dembo, a UC Irvine professor of educational psychology.

“Even though these programs are usually very basic--so they can reach a [broad spectrum] of the population--there may be parents who will get something from this information,” Dembo said. “Does it have much of an impact? We don’t really know yet.”

Deputy City Manager Catherine Standiford, 37, found that some Family University philosophies mirror her own. Materials encouraging husbands and wives to court each other appealed to her because Standiford and her husband John already have a weekly date.

“These ideas aren’t necessarily new to me, but they help reinforce things I’m already doing,” she said.

Many lessons taught in Family University materials are basic ones: Talk to your children; ask them questions that can’t be answered with just a yes or no; avoid lecturing and admit when you do not know the answer.

“I think everybody knows these things,” said Karen Odom Stephens, associate director of Human Resources Communications for Price Waterhouse in Tampa, Fla. “But a lot of times we’re so frazzled and feeling overwhelmed because of the demands of work that we need something to bring us back to reality.

“Ultimately, the responsibility for the happiness of your family is with you and your family,” Stephens said. “But we feel that if we can provide a supportive environment where it somewhat lessens that tension between work and home, then everyone gains.”

Thom Black, co-founder and vice president of Family University, admits the lessons are not “brain surgery,” but he said they are often overlooked as work and family compete for time and resources.

(BEGIN TEXT OF INFOBOX / INFOGRAPHIC)

Building a Strong Family

Family University’s program to broaden life skills includes a variety of tools. Tips from Family University for developing family cohesion:

* Treat your family like you would treat a business client

* Encourage family members daily to do what each does well

* Develop strong familial bonds by spending time together

* Don’t wait for an emergency to learn the value of family

Training Tools

Some of the literature and resources offered through Family University: * Books, leaflets, cards and games

* Audiotapes designed to be used while commuting

* Smart Families magazine

* CD-ROM