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Now He Tells Us: Ken Starr said...

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Now He Tells Us: Ken Starr said the independent counsel law should be abolished. “He could have told us that $40 million ago, ya think?” (Daily Scoop)

Killer Diet: Jack Kevorkian has gone on a hunger strike. “You think he, of all people, would know a better way to kill himself.” (Daily Scoop)

Downsizing: Pamela Anderson Lee sold her Malibu mansion. “That makes sense--since she had her breast implants removed, she doesn’t really need all that room.” (Alex Kaseberg)

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Smoke and Mirrors: David Blaine, the magician who was buried alive under a New York City street, has emerged. “He said he was virtually without stimulation for seven days and can’t for the life of him figure out how Tipper Gore does it.” (Bill Williams)

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The Essential

David Letterman

Things New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani hasn’t cracked down on yet:

10. Fat guys in tank tops.

7. The Yankees’ bimonthly losses.

5. Street magicians who bury themselves underground as a lame publicity stunt.

3. Unauthorized parachuting off Al Roker.

1. Darryl Strawberry.

Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053.

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