The Eyes Have It

Where’s the talent? How to explain the popularity and success of performers such as Britney Spears, Jennifer Lopez, and that quartet of platform toting, hair-extension wearing, tone deaf Brits otherwise known as the Spice Girls?

Instruments? They don’t play them. Songs? They don’t write them.

The secret to their success? Booties, busts and the ability to shake ‘em. Now there’s talent, I guess. These ladies owe their fame and fortune to a lucky spin in genetic roulette.

But let’s face it. Behind these flawless faces and bods to match there’s much to be desired, namely musical talent.

I don’t want to discount true ladies of music, you know, the ones who actually sing live and/or know how to play an instrument. Divas like Alanis Morisette, Jewel, Lauryn Hill, Mariah Carey and Sara McLachlan--among many others--are true musical delights. But these women too are guilty of contributing to the clique of female artists that won’t tolerate aesthetic imperfection.

You wanna make it in this business sweetheart, then you’d better be hot, nothing short of imaginary. Catch my drift? And it doesn’t hurt to have been married to or dating a record exec. (Mariah Carey and Jennifer Lopez). In “their world,” you can’t be ugly if you want to make money.

Don’t believe me? Ask yourself how many unattractive, old, droopy women you see gracing the covers of their hit albums. Thought so.

And for the unlucky gals not biologically graced with the beauty of their industry counterparts, too bad!

OK, there are exceptions to the rule. Not so obvious “beauties” such as Melissa Etheridge, Tracy Chapman and Yoko Ono have indeed proven that there is talent far too outstanding to be ignored, no matter the artist or what she looks like.

But these musicians are few and far between, and many have endured public criticism, much more than their counterparts at the other end of the spectrum of the industry--the males.

Men, it seems, are exempt from the cruel realities of the music industry, an industry that actually accepts them based on talent. Imagine that coming from the same industry that shuns women who don’t have the right “look.”

Think about it for a minute. Think of all the unattractive male musicians whose success, paychecks and, in some cases, even sex appeal, are unfathomable to most. For most, it’s talent and maybe some luck and hard work that carry them to the top.

The music industry has its share of pretty-boy puppets, but N’Sync and Ricky Martin aside, it’s safe to assume that men can rely on talent.

“It’s true that when you actually take a minute to think about not-so-attractive musicians, and celebs in general, men by far outnumber the women,” said Nicole Bertsch, 21, one of a number of people I interviewed on this topic. “Girls just throw themselves at ‘rock stars,’ even if they are ugly.”

I’m not in the business of dictating just exactly who these “uglies” are. You all know who I’m talking about.

But why is this so?

Looking at the dynamics behind this trend, the reason may seem obvious: Men will only buy a CD if they think the chick is hot, otherwise, forget it. Wrong! Of the men and women I asked about this, the women were far more judgmental and critical when it comes to looks than the men, especially when it comes to our own sex. Shame on us girls!

Another relevant component to the career of modern “do-it-all gals” is marketing. Whether sponsoring organizations, events or products, the faces of these beauties are plastered everywhere. It’s all to make money--lots of it.

Of course their faces must be perfect. In the 1990s, one cannot hide imperfections in forgiving high-contrast black and white. Luckily, surgical enhancements have become as common as a visit to the dentist.

I’m just thankful that my musical talent and ability don’t have to be showcased outside the realm of my car or shower, places where I can’t be touched by public scrutiny, no matter what I look like.