A consumer’s guide to the best and worst of sports media and merchandise. Ground rules: If it can be read, played, heard, observed, worn, viewed, dialed or downloaded, it’s in play here.

What: “Decisions on the Rules of Golf: Official Rulings on Over 1,000 Golf Situations,” by the USGA and Royal and Ancient Golf Club. $19.95.

Publisher: Triumph Books.

Golf is an uncomplicated game, really. Just swat the ball a few times and roll it into the cup, then move along to another hole and do it again. The less you think about it, the better.

The rules of golf are another matter. My golf buddy, Steve, doesn’t have a problem with them, of course, because he plays by his own; his nickname is “Free Drop.” But keeping the actual definitions and applications straight can be as daunting as a 220-yard par three over a snake pit.

Speaking of snakes, here’s a little Q. & A. from Page 265 of the book:

“Question: Is a snake an outside agency or a loose impediment?

“Answer: A live snake is an outside agency. A dead snake is a loose impediment.”

Geez, a rule book with trick questions. I always figured a live snake is a hazard and a dead snake is cause for celebration.

Anyway, this exhaustive book of more than 600 pages is perfect for any inquisitive golfer who has several hundred hours of free time to go over detail after detail; there is no stone left unturned.

Speaking of stones, here’s a little Q.& A. from Page 361:

“Q: A player’s ball lies in the rough directly behind a loose stone the size of a watermelon. The stone can be removed only with much effort. Is it a loose impediment which may be removed?

“A: Yes. Stones of any size (not solidly embedded) are loose impediments and may be removed, provided removal does not unduly delay play.”

Which is why Tiger Woods can get a dozen fans to move a boulder out of his way in a jiffy and get on with winning $200,000, but you and I are out of luck because calling for a bulldozer would cause an undue delay.

It’s tough to come up with a predicament that isn’t covered in this book. You’ll find an answer for questions involving any situation you can imagine yourself in and many you can’t.

Can you remove a dead land crab lodged against your ball in a bunker? Can you get rid of an anthill in your putting line? What if you give your opponent an 18-inch putt, he says no, he’ll go ahead and putt it, then misses? Is the putt still conceded?

You’ll have to buy the book to find out.

What the heck, here are the answers: No, yes, and yes.