Teens Talk About Getting Along

Los Angeles school officials heard some straight talk from 600 middle and high school leaders Wednesday about violence, sex and music at a gathering designed to promote peace.

In an informal, talk-show style summit at Shepherd of the Hills Church, Los Angeles school district Supt. Ruben Zacarias, school board member Julie Korenstein and other officials listened as outcasts, honor students and former gang members told it like it is:

On violence: “We tend to hate ourselves because we grow up hating each other. . . . [Schools] need to increase peace between races.”

On sex and respect: “No girl deserves to be degraded. She may be a [expletive], but she doesn’t deserve to be degraded.”

On music: “Some teenagers have weaker minds, and they could be influenced by music . . . but if they have self-esteem, they won’t be.”

Although the school massacre in Colorado was a popular topic, school officials said the summit wasn’t a knee-jerk reaction to the shooting, but rather an ongoing effort to select student leaders of all backgrounds who can promote conflict resolution among classmates.

The annual summits began seven years ago after some district campuses experienced racial problems and riots.

“Like it or not, you have tremendous influence in your schools,” said Zacarias, or “Dr. Z,” as the teens greeted him, often with a high five, a salute or a friendly nod of the head and a “What’s up?”

Before a panel in which district administrators and school police asked students questions on snitching, safety and school spending, Zacarias surveyed the room of teenagers, smiled and said:

“The next century is your world.”

Students clapped, cheered and clamored for the microphone. When speaking, they weren’t required to give their names, and most didn’t.

On whether they’d tell on a classmate who threatened violence:

“I don’t feel comfortable telling on anyone because the majority of the time, if they see you on the streets, there will be retaliation.”

Another student respectfully disagreed: “I don’t have a problem telling on my best friend, or anyone, because I don’t want to get shot.”

When school officials asked how the district could best spend its money on programs that would help students feel connected to the school and community, hands shot up and answers varied from supporting more athletic programs to reaching out to parents to funding more nonathletic extracurricular activities.

Referring to how the Columbine High killers were known as loners and misfits, one girl said schools should offer as many clubs as possible.

“People are always made fun of at my school,” she said. There needs to be a safe, positive place where “all the people who are made fun of can get together and feel like they belong.”

Although most students showed respect toward one another, at times the group discussions resembled a “Jerry Springer” show, such as during a debate on the influence of rap and alternative music.

As a snippet of singer Monifah’s “Touch It” was played, some teens hollered, booed and tried to see who could make the most offensive remarks about whether a girl who dresses sexy is asking for it:

“If a girl tells me to touch her, it’s all good,” one boy said as his friends cheered and girls jeered.

Another boy calmed things down when he advocated mutual respect. If a girl is wearing revealing clothes, “it’s not acceptable” to assume she wants sex, he said to a round of applause.

At another session, some teens stood up and clapped when a girl encouraged adults not to harp on the negative, explaining that if they recognized the good, teens would feel valued and fewer problems would exist.

“With all due respect,” she said to the school officials, “. . . what about the positive things we do?”