VALLEY / VENTURA COUNTY SPORTS : PIGSKIN PROPHECIES

Whew, that was close. Only a victory in the five-point game kept your swami from losing last week to a 77-year-old woman who hadn’t seen a football game since FDR was in office. For those keeping score, the two-week tally stands: All-Knowing Supreme Being 1, Rest of Universe 1. Not bad, but here comes trouble in the form of Eric Sondheimer, the Grand Pooh-Bah of prepdom. Eric has been spewing his opinions since Poly, his alma mater, was good in football. In other words, too damn long!

GAME OF THE WEEK (5 points)

Saugus at Notre Dame

THE PROPHET SAYS: Sondheimer wore his Notre Dame letterman’s jacket all week, so we know who he’s picking. Big surprise. Saugus finally ventures out of Simi Valley for competition and discovers what it’s like to play a real defense. Notre Dame, 28-14.

SONDHEIMER SAYS: Amateur Hour is over. It’s time for a professional to expose The Prophet. Let’s start with a game in which Saugus fans actually think their team has a chance to win, primarily because of the passing of David Parker. But every quarterback’s worst nightmare is defensive lineman Travis Johnson of Notre Dame. If Johnson becomes bored, his best friends, defensive ends Alec Moss and Chris Shibel, inflict further agony. Bring on Alemany. Notre Dame, 42-7.

OTHER TOP GAMES (each 3 points)

Buena at Newbury Park

THE PROPHET SAYS: Newbury Park wasn’t doing that well before losing its quarterback to injury for the season. Things don’t figure to get better with a second-stringer in there, particularly against a formidable opponent. Buena, 27-15.

SONDHEIMER SAYS: Remember how quarterback Drew Bennett of UCLA came off the bench last week for injured Cory Paus and led the Bruins to victory? Cameron Merrill of Newbury Park is capable of filling in for injured Chris Lombardo. But he won’t get to celebrate a victory. Buena will control the clock and the game with its balanced offense. Buena, 24-14.

St. Bonaventure at Nordhoff

THE PROPHET SAYS: A reporter who no longer works here used to keep a miniature St. Bonaventure helmet on his computer. Really irritating. For that alone, I’d love to see Nordhoff win. But the Seraphs (what the heck is a Seraph, anyway?) are kicking booty. St. Bonaventure, 35-14.

SONDHEIMER SAYS: Jon Mack was an assistant coach at Notre Dame, Alemany and Loyola before building a powerhouse at St. Bonaventure. He prides himself on doing everything first class, particularly his team’s prodigious pregame meals. As long as sophomore tailback Lorenzo Booker doesn’t have an upset stomach from eating too much lasagna, the Seraphs rule. St. Bonaventure, 42-14.

Dorsey at Taft

THE PROPHET SAYS: Message to Troy Starr: You will lose! You will lose! You will lose! You will lose! You will lose! You will lose, lose, lose, lose, lose! You will lose! You will lose! You will lose! Got that? Dorsey, 32-17.

SONDHEIMER SAYS: Even with the smartest quarterback around, Brandon Hance, and Coach Troy Starr on the sideline with his suspension repealed, the Toreadors don’t have any run defense to stop Dorsey. Is Frank Grossman in the neighborhood? Dorsey, 28-14.

THE REST (1 point each)

* Westlake at El Camino Real: The Prophet: Westlake, 35-14. Sondheimer: I’m so old I saw Rick Hayashida play high school football at Chatsworth and Jim Benkert at El Camino Real. Both are much better coaches than players. El Camino Real has no passing game. Westlake, 24-7.

* Valencia at Oxnard: The Prophet: Valencia, 28-14. Sondheimer: If St. Paul could score 53 points against the Yellowjackets, imagine how many yards and touchdowns Manuel White will score. Valencia, 48-14.

* Cleveland at Monroe: The Prophet: Monroe, 21-14. Sondheimer: The Cavaliers took Reseda too lightly last week. After a good tongue-lashing, the players understand not to believe their press clippings. Cleveland, 28-21.

* Canyon at Quartz Hill: The Prophet: Canyon, 14-7. Sondheimer: Watch linebacker Colin MacNeil cause havoc in the Quartz Hill backfield. Canyon, 28-7.

* Sylmar at Hart: The Prophet: Hart, 45-21. Sondheimer: The good news for Sylmar is Hart players are overconfident and think they’re headed to a 14-0 season after blowing out Quartz Hill and Thousand Oaks. The bad news is the Hart players might be right. Hart, 42-14.

* Calabasas at Verdugo Hills: The Prophet: Verdugo Hills, 14-7. Sondheimer: Southern Section is better than City Section, at least this season. Calabasas, 14-7.

* Rio Mesa at Agoura: The Prophet: Agoura, 24-21. Sondheimer: Get ready for an offensive shootout, with the difference being Agoura has running back Justin Richter. Agoura, 35-28.

* La Canada at Burroughs: The Prophet: Burroughs, 28-7. Sondheimer: After losing to Newbury Park and Notre Dame, Burroughs proves teams do get better after playing tough nonleague opponents. Burroughs, 24-21.

* Thousand Oaks at Camarillo: The Prophet: Camarillo, 27-17. Sondheimer: As long as running back Loren Cerny of Camarillo isn’t surfing at game time, the Scorpions will have too much offense for the Lancers. Camarillo, 35-21.

* Reseda at Birmingham: The Prophet: Reseda, 28-14. Sondheimer: Who’s Eddie Robinson? He keeps rushing for more than 100 yards and is making Coach Joel Schaeffer look like an offensive genius. Reseda, 35-14.

* Royal at Ventura: The Prophet: Ventura, 34-14. Sondheimer: The Highlanders have no chance to stop junior tailback Tyler Ebell. Ventura, 21-17.