Teenagers, Sex and Responsibility

Re “Sex With Minors Can Have Major Consequences,” Jan. 30.

Although I appreciate the efforts of Ventura County to educate teenagers about the statutory rape laws, I am increasingly frustrated with our society’s efforts to address the problem of teenage sexuality. As this article states, when there is only a three-year difference in the age of the teens the crime is only a misdemeanor. Unfortunately the real “major problems” are ignored as in this true situation one of my students brought to me last week.

My student (16) is living with her boyfriend (19) and their son (2) in her parents’ apartment. The parents are now going to allow her brother’s girlfriend (15) to move in because her parents have kicked her out. The “problem” is that the landlord has raised the rent and the teenagers are being asked to pay rent in order to “learn responsibility.”

So, what do you advise in this all too common situation? Do you focus on: A) the state, or county, or city, or school system for not providing adequate educational programs; B) the teenagers for thinking they were old enough to handle sex; C) the parents for providing shelter to their children and grandchildren but [who] have a warped sense of responsibility; D) the parents of the girlfriend for disowning their daughter because she is sexually active; E) the landlord for raising the rent while allowing 12 people to live in a two-bedroom apartment; F) the empathetic teacher for not solving major social issues.

What would you do? If you chose A, then your solution is to throw more money at the problem as did Ventura County and develop programs which will be ignored. If you focus on B, C or D, you will be accused of interfering in family matters and not understanding cultural differences. If E is your choice, then you must return to A for not providing enough low-cost housing. If F is your concern, then respond to this letter with practical solutions.

Unfortunately most of you will select “None of the above” because you are as frustrated as I am.

MEDA LUBLINER

Canoga Park