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Ex-Wrestler Dies in Apparent Murder-Suicide

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Special to The Times

A former Rio Mesa High School wrestler is suspected of slashing the throat of his 20-year-old girlfriend in her college dormitory before jumping in front of a New York subway train over the weekend, authorities said Sunday.

Investigators said Kathleen A. Roskot was killed by 23-year-old Tom Nelford inside her dormitory at Columbia University. Her body was discovered by college security officers at 2:05 p.m. Saturday.

About an hour later, Nelford, who had dropped out of Columbia in 1998 but continued to live on campus, committed suicide by jumping in front of a subway train police said.

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Roskot’s wallet, containing some of her personal papers and her Social Security card, were found in his possession, authorities said.

Nelford’s mother, who still lives in Oxnard, declined to comment on her son’s death Sunday night.

But one of his friends, 22-year-old Gabe Roman of Simi Valley, remembered his former wrestling competitor as a laid-back, fun guy who loved to draw and designed T-shirts for the league championship.

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“He was really nice. He had a lot of friends and some really good family. He wasn’t like some crazy, whacked-out guy,” said Roman, who was chosen Athlete of the Year at Oxnard High in 1995 by the Tri-County Wrestling Assn.--the same year the group selected Nelford top athlete at Rio Mesa.

“He was the sweetest guy in the world,” said Joshua Ortega, Nelford’s close friend and former high school classmate.

“He always greeted me with a hug when he saw me,” Ortega said, adding that “the jocks loved him because he was a great athlete. The girls loved him because he was a sweet guy.”

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“I knew him as a wonderful boy,” said Todd Stoke, Nelford’s wrestling coach at Rio Mesa. But Stoke was reluctant to elaborate on his former student, who placed second in the state Freestyle Wrestling Tournament five years ago.

“I just spoke to his mother and she asked me not to say anything, and I have to respect that,” he said. “She’s been through a lot.”

At Columbia, Nelford was described by some students as a troubled, dangerous, drug-addicted dropout who kept up a semblance of college life via Roskot, by living in a fifth-floor dorm room with her and two roommates although he no longer attended classes.

Even Nelford’s friends described him as troubled. “It seemed he was fighting something,” said a Columbia graduate who had once roomed with Nelford and asked not to be named. “His close friends could tell. He never talked about it, but there definitely was something.”

Those who knew him said Nelford, who competed on the Columbia wrestling team, dropped out after his sophomore year in May 1998. Nelford, who played guitar, returned to New York the following spring to pursue a music career. At that time, he started dating Roskot.

Ortega said he met Roskot when she and Nelford visited Ventura County about three weeks ago. “We went dancing,” he said. “They seemed like a happy couple.”

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But some of Roskot’s friends said the couple’s relationship was not without problems.

“I’ve heard horrible things,” said Gabrielle Snyder, a former college teammate of Roskot. “They were afraid of him,” she said of the roommates, members of the Columbia lacrosse team, as Roskot was.

“I’ve heard that he had a drug problem. They had lots of issues,” said Snyder, who played alongside Roskot on the 1998 Columbia lacrosse team.

Ortega, a 22-year-old junior at Cal State Northridge, said he does not believe his friend is responsible for Roskot’s death.

“A hundred things could have happened,” he said. “Hell, if my girlfriend was murdered, I’d feel pretty distraught.”

On Sunday, friends, teammates and coaches said Roskot was an athletic, overachieving college sophomore who seemed invincible. Every time they saw her, it seemed, she was getting stronger or faster.

“She had so much promise and was such a great kid,” said her mother, Julia. “I was so proud of her.”

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Kathleen Roskot grew up in Suffolk County, N.Y. Like her two brothers, she played lacrosse, leading her high school team to the state finals in 1998, the year she was named an All-American. She was also an accomplished soccer player, regarded as one her school’s best athletes. An “A” student as well as a gifted athlete, she was recruited by several colleges.

“She was a very smart player,” said her high school soccer coach, Eleanor Naslonski. “She knew what she wanted to do and how to get it done.”

Sean Gardiner, Dan Morrison, J. Jioni Palmer, Steven Kreytak, Stephanie McCrummen and Hugo Kugiya of the Newsday staff contributed from New York. Times Community News reporters Katie Cooper and Gail Davis contributed from Ventura County.

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