You Are Here On The Air Ball

Hyped as: Hidden Beach Recordings gala label launch, “including investor and NBA legend Michael Jordan,” at the company’s Santa Monica studios.

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The Groove: Why a record label? “Why not?” answers Jordan, who towers head and earring above a fortress of bodyguards. Really, what’s to ponder about a minuscule diversion of one’s discretionary millions? To the soiree, however, he apparently gives only his presence. On the spacious grounds, L.A. grade-schoolers painted murals to express the R&B;/jazz label’s theme of “Celebrating the Independent Creative Spirit.” (Kids work cheaper than designers; perhaps they’re celebrating free spirit?) The wait staff serves martinis in plastic glasses. (Gin, no vodka. Tanqueray sponsored; Absolut didn’t.) And the slim buffet (sandwiches and quesadillas) went on and off in less time it takes to play a CD sampler. Party energy is at full-tilt krush groove, however: Music industry types chat festively into their cell phones, and label artists Jill Scott and Brenda Russell lay on some bluesy sets. “I heard it was going to be a live party,” says Coolio. Besides, adds Christopher Reid, a.k.a. “Kid” of Kid ‘n Play: “When you have enough of the vino, you don’t care about the beef or the duck.”

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In the House: “I just love that Michael is a multidimensional athlete, not just on the court, but in business,” says actress Holly Robinson Peete. “It’s a good example he’s setting for other athletes to be involved in other stuff after they retire.” Good thing label chief Steve McKeever comes onstage and introduces himself, or the night would have been all about Jordan. The came-on-Michael’s-behalf posse is sizable and diverse: Steven Seagal, Gabrielle Reece, Norm Coleman (the mayor of St. Paul, Minn., whose claim to fame is losing the governor’s race to Jesse Ventura) and wife, actress/model Laurie Coleman. It makes for a mild wow-all-in-one-room thrill. Paul Reubens’ appearance, he says, is on behalf of Brenda Russell. And what is the answer to the “Who Is Jill Scott?” question plastered all over an Avenue of Promotional Displays (our caps) that leads to the performance stage? “Jill Scott is signed to my production company out in Philadelphia,” answers deejay Jazzy Jeff, taking some of the air out of Jordan’s ball. “We did about 95% of her record, so this is kind of a release party for us.”

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What’s The Score?

CELEB QUOTIENT: Jordan’s presiding does not translate into the promised A-list. For the rest, what have y’all been up to lately?

WOW FACTOR: Robust party vibe and solid performances mitigate the nickel-and-dime decor

CHOW LINE: Not bad, but not much.