South Dakota Program Sows Seeds of Good Parenting in State Prisons

Bill Janklow was a juvenile delinquent, he says. He quit high school in 1956 and spent time “raising a lot of hell” as a teenager.

Children, he says now, need a good home life. And as governor of South Dakota, he has the power to do something about it.

About 3,000 male and female prison inmates have taken classes on how to be good parents since Janklow decided in 1998 that the instruction was necessary.

Parenting is work, but it’s not complicated, Janklow says. Some people just don’t know how to be parents.

“It’s something people want to know because of the natural adult instinct towards protecting and nurturing young people,” the governor says.

He adds: “What I’m trying to reach are the people that don’t know any better.”

Prison is as good a place as any to teach parenting because most inmates will go free someday, Janklow says. Even those who have never had children or whose children are grown can benefit, he says.

Inmates are not always happy when told they must take parenting classes as part of a parole system that allows automatic release at early dates if certain conditions are met. Those imprisoned since Dec. 14, 1998, must agree to parenting instruction or stay locked up for their entire sentences.

“At first I was kind of annoyed at having to take the classes,” says Jennifer Wilen, imprisoned in September on a drug conspiracy conviction. “I was a good mom, but after I started learning stuff, I could see that it’s worthwhile.”

Wilen, 24, is pregnant. Although she can’t care for her four young children now, the parenting classes amount to homework so she can make it up to them when she is freed, she says.

“I have to be a role model,” she says. “I can’t tell my children what to do if I’m not doing the same thing. I have to practice what I preach.”

Nita Arndt, 43, of Sioux Falls, was sent to prison in August, also for drug conspiracy. She’s eligible for parole in a year and plans to use what she’s learned on her grandchildren. Her four children are grown and well adjusted, she says.

“They’ve turned out really good. They’re not in here. I am.”

Many inmates, those in juvenile custody and a growing segment of the rest of the population, have not had good parenting, Janklow said.

“Some families are in their third generation of bad parenting, and it’s become obvious that we can’t fix all the problems in society when everybody’s an adult. We have to do it with the kids.”

Youngsters placed in state reform schools also must take the classes.

Aaron Miller, activities director at the women’s prison, teaches parenting skills. Prisoners must attend six sessions of two hours each.

Miller pairs up daily with the inmates to practice what they have learned, assuming the role of the child to see how the women handle each situation.

On the final day of the course, inmates pair with each other and switch roles as Miller evaluates them. Those who do poorly must take the course again.

“He can be a real brat,” Arndt says, describing Miller’s playacting antics. “But it puts us in a situation to see how we’re going to handle it.”

Those who teach parenting in state prisons and reform schools were trained by professionals from Boys Town, the Nebraska-based home for orphaned and troubled children of all races and religions. The “Common Sense Parenting” program stresses ways to effectively talk with children, praise them and, when necessary, use appropriate discipline.

Expectations of children are highlighted, emphasizing positive behavior and explaining consequences for misbehavior. Parents also are taught how to calmly deal with emotional situations at home.

Miller says even those without children find ways to use their new skills.

“You can use effective praise with fellow inmates, your cellmate, staff, husband, your boyfriend,” he says.

The average women’s prison sentence is 11 months. While that may not seem long, it’s long enough to make a noticeable difference in some young children, Miller says.

“If you leave your child when they’re 6 years old, a lot of changes may take place before you get out,” Miller says.

“We’ve found that one of the biggest challenges when inmates leave the system is not to find a job or come up with money or find a place to live. If they have children, at the snap of a finger they’re expected to be a full-time mom again.”

Laurie Feiler, director of noninstitutional programs and planning for the state prison system, says about 3,000 inmates in the men’s and women’s prisons have completed the parenting course.

About 500 of them were in prison before the December 1998 edict but wanted to take the classes anyway.

“We just see it as one piece of the puzzle for people who are incarcerated,” she says. “You need to learn how to work. You need to stop drinking, to at least get a GED [high school equivalency certificate], know how to be a parent and learn to control your anger.

“Those are all things that we think you need to do in order to increase your chances of being successful when you get out.”

Teaching parenting skills may not bring immediate results, Janklow adds. But he anticipates future dividends for society.

“I think 10 years from now we’re going to see a huge difference in the crop of kids that are growing up,” the governor says. “Good parenting doesn’t cost any money. The truth of it is, the poorest people in the world can be marvelous parents, and some of the richest people are terrible parents.”

He likens parenting instruction to planting a tree and watching it grow.

“I’ll never see any results at all while I’m governor. There’s no fruit coming off these trees now. But when they start to bear fruit, you’re going to see a huge difference in how well the fruit comes out of these people trees.”