Torre Will Find Wells Has Much Less Volume

Ken Davidoff of Newsday commenting on the transformation of pitcher David Wells: “How fitting. In this year of the Yankees’ overhaul, even their one new player who isn’t really new looks and talks like a new person. At least for now, it’s a kinder, gentler Boomer as well as a thinner one [by about 30 pounds].

“Take, for instance, the Metallica music he used to blast on the days he pitched, the music that Joe Torre admittedly loathed during Wells’ first Yankees’ stay in 1997-98.

“That music will no longer take over the Yankees’ clubhouse every five days, Wells has said.... Instead, he’ll just listen to it on his headphones.”

Hmmm. How long will that last?

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Trivia time: Who holds the Pacific 10 Conference record for rebounds in a game?

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Barren Garden: Kevin Kernan of the New York Post, commenting on the empty seats at Madison Square Garden during a recent Knicks’ game:

“There were 37 empty seats in one small midcourt section alone at the end of the first quarter. There were thousands of empty seats throughout the building. The most faithful and honest fans in the world are rightfully frustrated.”

Kevin, have you researched the faithfulness and honesty of all fans in the world?

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It wouldn’t sell: Scott Ostler in the San Francisco Chronicle: “Nike was worried that a messy divorce settlement might require them to launch the new [Michael] Jordan shoe under the name ... Air Alimony.”

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One too many? Comedy writer Jerry Perisho:

“Minnesota star Kevin Garnett bought drink tickets and had them distributed to the first 10,000 fans at Wednesday’s game. Each ticket was good for a free beer.

“Isn’t that what sports is all about ... one more free beer on a work night, right before getting on the freeway for the drive home?”

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Open wide: There was a picture on this page of Wednesday’s paper showing Mo Vaughn of the Mets hunkering over a giant “Mo-Licious Sandwich” at a New York deli. Mo wasn’t exactly enthusiastic about the endorsement.

“To endorse this sandwich is not really the message I want to send to the club,” he said. “You can’t even eat one side. You have to take it home and eat it for a week.”

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Crash diet: After batting .187 last season, Chicago Cub catcher Todd Hundley hired a nutritionist, watched what he ate and lost 12 pounds in the off-season.

He acknowledged boos from fans at Wrigley Field provided motivation, but he isn’t complaining.

“I’ve been booed by 40,000 at Shea Stadium and by 60,000 in L.A. That’s part of the game,” he said. “I deserved it. You get booed, it kind of jolts you a bit. They pay good money to come in and have the right to do that.”

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Trivia answer: Swede Halbrook of Oregon State, 36, against Idaho on Feb. 15, 1955, when the conference was known as the Pacific Coast Conference.

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And finally: Greg Hansen in the Arizona Daily Star, commenting on Wildcat Coach Lute Olson’s reaction to Thursday night’s 77-76 loss to UCLA at Pauley Pavilion: “As Olson left the interview room, someone placed a bottle of Gatorade next to him, suggesting it was his drink. He pushed it away. ‘Is there arsenic in that?’ he asked.”

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Mal Florence