The Summer Heat Turns Clubhouse Into Madhouse

Choking Dogs’ update: Dodger pitcher Andy Ashby, noticing a clubhouse full of media before Tuesday’s game, remarked, “Vultures.”

I had no idea Ashby and the Dodgers already consider themselves “dead meat,” but as the day unfolded it became obvious the pressure of mid-July baseball is getting to them.

When I asked Ashby to explain himself, he wimped out and said he was just talking to himself, I guess a la Richard Nixon talking to the paintings on the White House wall when they began to close in on him.

At this rate, come August I worry it will be “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” every time I venture into the Dodger clubhouse.

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AFTER YET another inept Dodger performance Tuesday that dropped the team out of first place, Manager Jim Tracy closed the clubhouse for a team meeting. I wonder who was assigned to bring the treat.

Afterward, Tracy told the media, “I’m not concerned,” which apparently was not the same message he had relayed to his team a few minutes earlier.

In the clubhouse, meanwhile, Paul Lo Duca lost it, and he didn’t even play Tuesday. He should have reacted like Brian Jordan, who saw the media horde and, being the team leader they say he is, slipped out the back door rather than stand accountable. Who says he can’t fill Gary Sheffield’s shoes?

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THE MEDIA were just standing around waiting to talk with pitcher Hideo Nomo, but since Lo Duca was at his locker and everyone else in a Dodger uniform seemed to be in hiding, the media began quizzing the guy who didn’t play.

Lo Duca became weary of the repeated questions. You know how tough professional players have it, showing up to work at 10:30 for a 12:10 game, not playing and then having to put up with silly questions before heading home shortly after 4. It’s hardly worth the millions they pay you these days.

Someone asked about a corked bat, and that ticked off Lo Duca, and I guess it was a stupid question, but how are we going to know if the Dodgers misplaced their corked bats over the All-Star break if someone doesn’t ask? It wasn’t me, by the way.

Anyway, that was the corker for Lo Duca, the Dodgers’ union player rep, who wouldn’t talk to reporters a day earlier if they asked anything about the labor unrest in baseball. I would hope the Dodgers would post a list of questions on their Web site that Lo Duca can be asked, but in the meantime it’s probably going to be hit and miss.

Obviously upset, Lo Duca used a loud voice to get everyone’s attention in the clubhouse, and proclaimed: “We’re playing bad now, OK? That’s it.... We’ll come back tomorrow.... Geesh.”

Lo Duca, now officially unglued, carried his rant through the media throng as he made his way to the door: “Who cares?” he said. I was about to tell him that was a stupid question and to never ask it again, but he wasn’t about to be stopped.

“We got warning-track power now?” he announced loudly and somewhat sarcastically, and I guess that was his response to the question about using or not using corked bats, so maybe that does explain everything. “Are you ... ?”

Let’s just say little Paulie used a bad word, and then in a huff he was gone.

I decided to spend a little more time at Dodger Stadium because I didn’t want to be on the same freeway as little Paulie, given his rage, and watched as Nomo accepted his responsibility in defeat and answered everyone’s questions.

Shawn Green also appeared eventually to patiently field all queries, and for all I know Chad Kreuter was there, but who cares what he has to say.

Ashby was also at his locker, but talking only to himself.

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HERE’S THE situation: The Dodgers were down, 5-2, in the seventh, a man on first base, a right-hander on the mound for St. Louis and the pitcher due up for L.A.

Tracy went to his bench and called on Cesar Izturis, a .202 left-handed hitter. In comparison, F.P. Santangelo is Babe Ruth. Tracy opted to save left-handed hitting Dave Hansen, I guess so he’d have someone to hit a seven-run homer in the ninth to tie the game. But I ask, would you rather have a left-handed hitting Izturis, who can’t hit, or a right-handed hitting Lo Duca batting in that situation?

Izturis was safe on an error, the Cardinals went to the bullpen for a left-handed pitcher, and Tracy removed left-handed hitting Dave Roberts, who was something like six for 13 against left-handers, and replaced him with Marquis Grissom.

Would you rather have Grissom or Lo Duca trying to tie the game? I’d go with the guy with the corked bat. Grissom grounded into an inning-ending double play.

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I READ where Angel outfielder Tim Salmon says, “We all know the next four weeks are going to make our season,” and on the same day Angel GM Bill Stoneman is saying, “We still have 2 1/2 months left,” and there’s no reason to rush to improve the team just because closer Troy Percival is unavailable.

I have no doubt Salmon knows what he’s talking about.

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IF YOU watch the British Open, consider this: Sergio Garcia is 22, and if he plays golf for another 20 years, you’ll probably spend at least one year of your life watching him waggle and re-grip the club.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in an e-mail from Rick Mervis:

“What are your wife and daughters doing on page two of sports? I would think the Times would want the prestigious Page Two of sports in California’s largest paper to be authored by a person writing about sports. I know I could do better on napkins.”

It’s important all of us have a goal in life. Good luck.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com.