Happy Couple Making Sure That Their Vows Are Covered in All 50 States

One of the vanity license plates singled out on the knx1070.com Web site this month is W M P R, owned by Jackie Martin of Corona.

She explained: “No, this isn’t a radio station’s call letters. It stands for ‘World’s Most Perfect Relationship.’ My husband and I have been married 14 times in 14 states--with 36 to go! And we’ve never had a cross word between us.”

I’ll bet the caterer is even happier.

Food for thought (and confusion): Today’s servings (see accompanying) include:

* A restaurant that Paul Daniels of Huntington Beach figured was either “bragging that they’re down to one location or that they expanded from zero”--he wasn’t sure which.

* A credit card receipt from Vicki Momary of Torrance, who noticed that another eatery didn’t seem to know its location.

* A chef whose fame seems to know no boundaries, or does it? (from Francesca Gard of Long Beach).

* And, finally, in another of those weird-science experiments that seem so common, a delicacy that could be half chicken and half bear (from Marion Graff of L.A.).

Animal owners who belong in cages: It’s been quiet in Laguna Beach for city animal services officer Joy Lingenfelter, but she calls it “the lull before the storm.”

Spring is coming--the birthing season for critters such as raccoons, who, Lingenfelter said, think nothing of “tearing shingles off roofs and ripping open vents” to find places to start families.

Then comes the summer--exotic animals season. Crowded beach areas often attract characters showing off eye-catching pets, and Lingenfelter has made some notable rescues.

One man would smuggle monkeys in from Mexico and take them to public places, such as Laguna Beach, “to meet women,” she said. “He even tied one to the roof of his car while he was at the Laundromat.”

Not-so-humane humans (cont.): Lingenfelter also recalled these cases:

* A guy trying to sell leashed tigers out of the back of his red sports car near the beach. He got away but was later apprehended while displaying them at Newport’s Fashion Island.

* A 2-foot long Cayman alligator found in a creek in Laguna. “He [the gator] had probably lost his entertainment value for the owner, so he was abandoned,” Lingenfelter said. “That happens a lot with exotic animals.”

* Then there was the lion cub that was flown in from the Midwest in a dog cage. The animal belonged to two women.

Said Lingenfelter: “They wanted to use him in their strip show in Long Beach.”

Support issues: L.A. School Board member David Tokofsky called to say he spotted a billboard of curvaceous Angelyne next to the stalled Belmont Learning Complex project. Commented Tokofsky: “I’m not sure which is a bigger bust, Angelyne or Belmont.”

MiscelLAny: The discovery of the day was made by Phil Azelton of Westwood, who bought a doorstop at a drugstore and read these not so hard-to-follow instructions:

“Wedge doorstop between floor and door until tight.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve. harvey@latimes.com.