Heisman Race Seems to Be Stuck in Neutral

Gary Shelton of the St. Petersburg (Fla.) Times, on the competition for the Heisman Trophy: “If nothing else, the college football season has proven this: No one deserves this year’s Heisman.

“No one. There is no best college football player in the country. There is only a 500-way tie for second.”

We wonder if Shelton is aware of the impressive statistics compiled by USC quarterback Carson Palmer. It’s a school on the West Coast, Gary.

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Trivia time: Who holds the NFL record for consecutive games scoring touchdowns?

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Stop him if you can: Utah Jazz Coach Jerry Sloan commenting on productive 40-year-old veteran guard John Stockton to Jay Greenberg of the New York Post: “He doesn’t play off the floor. He’s not flying through the air. He does not dunk the ball. I’ve always felt he’s been underrated because people look at him as a guy who isn’t supposed to do what he does.”

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SEC is clean, of course: Mike Bianchi in the Orlando Sentinel: “Did you see where the Michigan basketball program has announced it would forfeit more than 100 victories and take down championship banners because of illicit money funneled from boosters to players?

“It’s a good thing SEC football programs haven’t taken the same approach or Vanderbilt would be retroactively awarded about 10 conference titles.”

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FYI: Glenn Dobbs, the All-American tailback from Tulsa, who died Tuesday at 82, was also a tailback for the Los Angeles Dons of the All-America Football Conference (1946-49).

The Dons shared the Coliseum with the Rams. Three original AAFC teams, the Cleveland Browns, Baltimore Colts and San Francisco 49ers, joined the NFL when the AAFC folded.

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Bragging: Retired wrestling great Dan Gable of Iowa, when asked on “Best Damn Sports Show Period” if he has ever milked a goat: “I have never milked a goat, but a lot of my opponents have looked like goats when I was done with them.”

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Same old sod: Lineman Mike Compton of the New England Patriots on the new grass-like artificial turf: “You can fix up her hair and paint her face, but if she’s ugly, she’s ugly.”

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Casual cook: John Mobley, Denver Bronco linebacker, on how much time Raider quarterback Rich Gannon had to throw on Monday night: “He was sitting back there roasting weenies.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1952, an NBA-record 13 players, five Baltimore Bullets and eight Syracuse Nationals, fouled out in an overtime game won by the Bullets, 97-91. So many Syracuse players fouled out that the officials let some of the players back into the game so the Nationals could keep five men on the court.

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Trivia answer: Lenny Moore of the Baltimore Colts, 18, 1963-65.

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And finally: Dwight Perry in the Seattle Times: “Judging by the infantile behavior after Tuesday night’s 36-34 loss to Marshall -- one assistant coach suspended for allegedly hitting a fan, another for trashing the visiting coaches’ box -- Miami of Ohio just got another reason to call itself the ‘Cradle of Coaches.’ ”

-- Mal Florence