That’s What You Call a Super Utility Pole

Hybrid golf clubs, sometimes called iron-woods or rescue clubs, were created to help duffers who can’t hit a long iron to save their handicap, but the pros got a hold of them and they’re not letting go.

A survey revealed that 25 PGA players were carrying utility clubs at two tournaments this summer. At the same two events last year, there were none.

And pros such as Jonathan Kaye are doing more than winning a $2 Nassau with the specialty clubs.

On the first playoff hole of the Buick Classic, Kaye was facing a 254-yard second shot. He pulled his TaylorMade 19-degree Rescue Mid and whacked the ball to within 11 feet of the pin, made the eagle putt and took home a $900,000 first prize.

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Trivia time: Who holds the Japanese record for balks in a season?

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Heavy stuff: The Denver Post’s Jim Armstrong isn’t sure if NFL players keep getting better, but he’s positive they keep getting bigger.

During his annual training camp tour, he spotted a 6-foot-9 tackle (Green Bay’s sixth-round pick Brennan Curtin), a 300-pound fullback (Kansas City’s free agent Joe Hall), a 264-pound quarterback (Minnesota’s Daunte Culpepper) and a 410-pound tackle (Aaron Gibson, who washed out with Detroit and Dallas and is giving it one last shot with Chicago).

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Hit it stiff: Comedian Brett Butler says she has nothing against cemeteries or golf courses, but she points out that the world is so crowded and both take up space that “living humans could make use of.”

“Think about it,” she said, “we could combine them. You’d have the same amount of holes, they’d only be deeper. And everyone would be wearing clothes they wouldn’t be caught dead in anywhere else.”

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Big tipper: Harmon Killebrew, reading one of the top 10 benefits of being in the Hall of Fame on the “Late Show with David Letterman”: “If I don’t have the money for the Domino’s kid, I just hand him any old bat and say, ‘I used this one for my 500th home run.’ ”

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Neigh sayer: From Norman Chad’s “Ask the Couch Slouch” column in the Orlando Sentinel:

Q: “Every time I go to the race track, I wonder to myself, ‘Do horses have it better than we do?’ Do they?”

A: Horses are retired to stud; humans are retired to South Florida. Advantage: horses.

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Pricey duds: Former University of Miami football players Tolbert Bain and Melvin Bratton have started a company called College Throwback U.S.A. and are creating replicas of old college football jerseys.

Deion Sanders is among the first to grant permission to use his name on the jerseys, which are expected to retail for about $300.

No word whether Sanders’ jersey will come with a stain where the mustard came off the hot dog.

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Trivia answer: Former Baltimore Oriole Chris Brock, who was called for two balks in a game last week and has 11.

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And finally: Tennis player Nicolas Kiefer, after touring Hugh Hefner’s Playboy mansion: “I can’t believe this is somebody’s house. He has 100 employees and eight girlfriends. Unbelievable.”

-- John Weyler