No High-Speed Chase Needed; There’s Plenty of Time to Catch This Culprit

Too often when police are called about a lawbreaker, the miscreant has disappeared by the time they arrive. Not so in the case of the jaywalker that Joe Teixeira of Laguna Beach read about in the police log of the city’s News-Post:

“Cajon Terrace, 300 block, stray in custody. A resident called police after she saw a turtle about 5 to 6 inches in size crossing the street. Animal Control was sent out and picked up the turtle.”

I guess that was one chase that the local news helicopters didn’t cover.

*

I hate those confusing computer manuals: Gene Manuel of Woodland Hills spotted a “frequently asked question” on Compaq’s Web site (see accompanying) about the key a user is often instructed to hit when activating a computer.

“My dad asked me this very same question several years ago when he bought me my first computer,” Manuel said. “Perhaps manufacturers really should put an ‘Any’ key on the keyboards.”

*

Unusual Motorist Warnings Dept.: Jay Grass of Whittier sent along a snapshot of a sign (see photo) he took in Nova Scotia -- a sign that a guy named Grass would be likely to notice, I guess.

*

Sadomasochistic dispensary? Debbie Pikul of Moorpark chanced upon a store (see photo) that, she said, “looks like the kind of place where someone could get hurt.”

Break a leg, or a tooth: Perhaps the old good-luck wish to superstitious performers needs an addendum.

Over the last three decades, dentist Lou Wenzlaff of Hollywood has treated numerous show biz-related mouth mishaps, including these:

* A singer in a production of “Showboat” reached out for what he thought was a bit of railing and fell from the ship to the stage, knocking out his front teeth.

* A singer was so deep in concentration in another performance that she tumbled off the stage into the orchestra pit, losing a tooth.

* A television writer bit into a frozen Snickers bar in a restaurant, breaking off his tooth. Wenzlaff, who treated him that night, recalled: “He brought the Snickers bar in and the tooth was still stuck in it.”

* Finally, an electrician for a TV show hit “some sort of immovable object” with his drill, Wenzlaff said -- a jolt that somehow caused the worker to hit himself in the mouth with his own fist. Another lost tooth.

I guess the moral of this item is be careful where you sing and be careful what you drill into, especially a frozen Snickers bar.

*

miscelLAny: Ginny Eden of Temecula found a restaurant that seemed to be encouraging customers to “treat” Mom on Mother’s Day -- but not in their eatery (see accompanying).

*

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083; by fax at (213) 237-4712; by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012; and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.