Spammers Sometimes Bombard Inboxes With Hare-Brained Schemes

Junk e-mailers make a lot of claims, but here’s one I’d never heard before. A company informed Robert Sharp of South Pasadena that it could, among other things, prevent him from losing rabbits (see accompanying).

Hopping right along: Angelenos and New Yorkers like to think their lifestyles have nothing in common, but that isn’t exactly true when it comes to naming hounds.

A recent New York Times study found that the most popular dog names in that city were Max, Lucky, Princess, Rocky and Buddy, in that order.

A while back, this column conducted an investigation in L.A. and found the top five were similar: Lady, Max, Rocky, Brandy and Bear. Lucky was No. 7 and Princess was No. 8.

Fido’s era is over on both coasts, I guess.

Dogs, celebrity-namesake division: The New York Times didn’t delve into this category, as your tireless columnist did. So we don’t know whether Gotham City has as many four-legged Elvises as L.A. (50, at last count). But I’m guessing that Manhattan trails in mutts named Freeway (151 in L.A.).

Open to interpretation: Today’s sign puzzlers include (see photos):

* A store holding an opening that may be “grand” but not its first (from Nancy Creedon).

* And a store that was either closing or drumming up more business, or maybe both (from Tim Creedon)

Hello, operator, I want to file a missing police department report: I suppose it would be unsettling for citizens of Long Beach to drop by the central police station and discover it was fenced off and in disrepair. And it might give the bad guys some ideas.

So the department posted a sign that gives its new, temporary location while the old digs are being rehabbed (see photo).

Literal baby-sitter: Some offbeat emergency calls recorded by dispatchers in the Star News, a Sheriff’s Department publication:

* “Neighbor taking items out of garage and running over them with her vehicle.”

* “Male, 10, becoming violent with baby-sitter. Baby-sitter sitting on child to restrain him from hitting her.”

* “Unknown naked female walked into house and started to take a shower. Female jumped out window and ran away.”

Perhaps she heard a Max or Rocky sounding off.

miscelLAny: Gerry Fry told the media Web site ronfineman.com about hearing one local TV news anchor mention preparations to “beautify Mother Teresa.” Quipped Fry: “Beautify ... beatify -- they are pretty close, aren’t they?”

Reach Steve Harvey at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 or steve.harvey@latimes.com.