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Unsafe at Any Speed

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Irwindale Speedway’s Saturday night NASCAR races put the “South” in Southland as thousands of speed junkies gather to watch automotive hysteria on the half-mile oval. It’s the Demolition Derby, though, that gets them up and stomping their feet. Four times this season, full-contact gladiators in their steel junkers will bash it up to see who will be the last man rolling. DD inverts the rules of the road, replacing the pursuit of safety with demented destruction. Fans call it fun. We got up close and personal down in the pit.

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John Zimmerman

Coffee barista; Torrance

1975 Chevrolet Caprice

What do you love about DD?

Winning. That, and the juice going through your brain.

How many points do you have on your license?

Too many to count. Speeding, reckless driving. I’ve run cars off the road and down hills; I’ve run into trees.

Describe your keys to winning.

Maintain focus. Make clean hits. Clean out the motor when you’re finished hitting so the carburetor can’t flood. Use your car wisely.

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Give us some DD lingo.

“Packing in.” A good car packs in well as it crashes.

What are you scared of?

Someone hitting the driver’s door.

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Milton “Madman Milt” Eisenhauer

Sculptor; Yucca Valley

1978 Chrysler New Yorker

How did you get into the derby?

My brother owns a towing service and got me my first car. Derby suits my rowdy nature. I got too old for barroom brawls, so I do this.

How many points do you have on your license?

No tickets in the last 15 years. My last was for driving without a seat belt. My insurance company gives me a safe driver discount.

Describe your keys to winning.

Winning? Who does that?

Give us some DD lingo.

The one-finger wave when someone screws up.

What are you scared of?

I’m a fisherman. Every once in a while I’ll scare myself while fishing.

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Bryan Hendry

Business and automotive student; Chino

1986 Dodge St. Regis

What do you love about DD?

When you’re little you fry ants with a magnifying glass or melt your plastic army men. I’m living out my childhood dream of wrecking cars.

How many points do you have on your license?

Let’s not go there. I had three accidents one summer, but none of them were my fault.

Describe your keys to winning.

You’ve got to talk to yourself and zone out everyone but who you are trying to hit. Also, keep in the corners and protect your front end.

Advice for regular drivers?

Watch out for road rage.

Tell us a piece of DD lingo.

“Be careful with the spider gear.” It means protect your differential.

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Rick Pimentel

Heavy equipment operator; Escondido

1963 Chrysler Imperial

How did you get into DD?

I started watching when I was 6, working in a pit crew when I was 12, and driving at 16. It’s a blast. You can go out and hurt someone and it’s legal. Smashing other people is like eating ice cream.

Describe your keys to winning.

Don’t ruin your car by getting angry. Keep cool and stay calm.

Give us some DD lingo.

“I’m gonna trash your car.”

How do you stay in shape?

Power bars and water.

Advice for regular drivers?

Watch your gestures on the freeway. The person you [tick] off might be a DD driver.

What are you scared of?

Nothing at all.

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