It’s Never Too Early to Take a T.O. for Reality

David Thomas of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram offers a top-five list of statements to “save for future reference” that were made by Terrell Owens after he became a Dallas Cowboy:

5. “I couldn’t be more elated to be here.”

4. “My main focus this year is to win ballgames, as it always has been, and win a championship.”

3. On whether the Cowboys will get the player but not the distracting personality: “I can assure that. You’ll see.”

2. “I’ll be a better teammate, a better person, a better man in life.”

“I will say, Jerry [Jones, team owner], on the record: I know what’s expected of me, and I won’t let you down.”

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Trivia time: On this date in 1967, Muhammad Ali defended his world heavyweight title and scored a seventh-round knockout at Madison Square Garden. Who was Ali’s opponent?

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For what it’s worth: Because of Owens, Sportsbook.com has upgraded the Cowboys’ odds of winning next season’s Super Bowl from 20-1 to 11-1.

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Georgia on his mind: Johnny Miller told Golf Digest that he has only two regrets: that he never won the Masters and that he has never announced the tournament for television.

“Although I’ve had five Emmy nominations the past 10 years, I’ve always wished my career would include a stint at Augusta,” said Miller, who finished second there three times. “The course has changed since I last played the Masters in 1995, but it’s essentially the same. I could call it from my bedroom if I had to.”

The master bedroom?

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Lasting impression: Making note of the taut-fitting attire of PGA Tour rookie Camilo Villegas, Richard Oliver of the San Antonio Express-News writes, “The last time the tour saw pants that tight, John Daly was leaning over to pick up a dropped cigarette.”

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Low blow: The Star of London reports that Malaysia’s Shahimi Abdul Hamid touched lips with a 15-foot cobra 51 times in three minutes to set a world record for venomous snake-kissing. Adds Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times: “That is, by a non-boxing promoter.”

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Almost perfect: Dan Bickley of the Arizona Republic, who labels the NCAA tournament “the most riveting production in sports,” notes: “Aside from Dick Vitale, there is nothing obnoxious about college basketball.”

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No biting, please: Two surfers in Australia have developed a shark-repellent called “Fang Shooey.” Actually, it’s a life-size shark decal that affixes to the bottom of a surfboard. “When a shark swims underneath they can easily identify the sticker as another shark,” co-creator Craig Wills told Surfer magazine.

The decal has proved effective in tests. It is not known, however, if surfers should use the decal during mating season.

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Trivia answer: Zora Folley, who went on to a career mark of 79-11-6 with 43 knockouts.

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And finally: From Greg Cote of the Miami Herald: “The only double-digit men’s basketball seeds still alive in the NCAA tournament are Bradley and George Mason. Sincere congratulations to both men.”