At Crunch Time, Fans of Buckeyes Flake Out

We all know what the Ohio State Buckeyes had for breakfast last Saturday: Northern Illinois, to the tune of 35-12.

But what about the other six days of the week? Especially with the Buckeyes and their supporters wanting to carbo-load for this weekend’s heavy-lifting assignment against Texas?

Now, they can grab a box of Buckeye HerOes, a new honey-nut-flavored oat cereal to fill the bellies of hungry Ohio State faithful as well as the obvious void for a Breakfast of Big Ten Champions.

HerOes made their debut in stores near campus Thursday, just in time for the new season. Each box features the likenesses of former Buckeyes stars A.J. Hawk, Bobby Carpenter and Anthony Schlegel.

And, for a limited time only, fans can exchange a handful HerOes box tops for a Maurice Clarett mug-shot mug. The front- and side-view artist’s renderings are said to be stunning.

Trivia time: Who was the first athlete to be pictured on the front of a Wheaties box?

Got second place? OK, Ohio State fan, you’ve successfully maneuvered your HerOes into your chipped plastic Art Schlichter-autographed bowl. Now what? A spoon would be useful. So would something to wash those honey-nut-flavored oats down. Something besides beer.

Maybe the new Body by Milk advertisements will provide a clue. Look at Alex Rodriguez, Sasha Cohen and David Beckham touting the wonders of low-fat milk and follow their lead.

Or maybe not. A-Rod in the playoffs, Cohen at the Olympics, Beckham at the World Cup? The Breakfast of People Who Came Close just doesn’t have a winning ring to it.

Gone too soon: Then again, maybe a healthy breakfast is a waste of time for young athletes and aspiring supercentenarians.

George Johnson, considered California’s oldest living person, died Wednesday at the age of 112. Johnson, who lived most of his life in Richmond, near San Francisco, was the state’s only supercentenarian -- a designation given to a person 110 or older -- despite a diet consisting mostly of sausage and waffles.

Alas, he failed to live long enough to see the San Francisco Giants win the World Series.

Bad timing: The pressure of the American League wild-card race has been tough on the Minnesota Twins, especially one former Twin who now does his perspiring in the television booth.

Bert Blyleven issued an on-air apology to FSN North viewers during the first inning of Sunday’s Twins-New York Yankees game for uttering a couple obscenities while not realizing the microphone was on during the pregame show.

Blyleven’s comments would have better sufficed on the postgame show. The Twins lost, 10-1.

Trivia answer: Yankees first baseman Lou Gehrig, in 1934.

And finally: Doug Flutie, onetime big-name quarterback and inspiration for the Breakfast of Short People, Flutie Flakes, debuted Saturday as a college football analyst for ESPN. Reminiscing about the 22th anniversary of his famous Hail Mary pass for Boston College against Miami, Flutie remarked, “I hate seeing it [on replays] because one of these times he’s going to drop it.”

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mike.penner@latimes.com