Rounding up the usual suspects

It’s never too soon to catch up on those players whose moves would change the balance of power if they ever went anywhere.

Not that we (necessarily) do this on a capricious basis, although they claim we do -- often within days after saying something telling, such as Kevin Garnett’s musing, “Thank God for opt-outs.”

Garnett: a particular Laker favorite, as the front office reportedly faces Minnesota and prays three times a day.

He can opt out of his contract in ‘08, has a house in Malibu, has always been friendly with Kobe Bryant, etc. Unfortunately, there’s one problem:

If he forces a trade this summer or goes in a sign-and-trade in ‘08, the Timberwolves will have a say and the last team they’d want to send him to is the Lakers.

In 1999, Minnesota General Manager Kevin McHale turned down a Lakers offer of Eddie Jones and Elden Campbell for free agent Tom Gugliotta, and wound up getting nothing when Googs signed with the Suns.

If Garnett leaves as a free agent in ‘08, the Lakers have only exceptions to offer.

Also, if the Timberwolves did decide to trade with the Lakers, they’d ask for Andrew Bynum, whom management wouldn’t (and shouldn’t) give up.

Aside from that, why not?

Paul Pierce: After hanging in for years with the lame Celtics while bidders lined up around the block, he all but officially put himself on the market last week.

“It’s definitely another year gone by for me,” he told the Boston Globe. “Another year I don’t get recognized for the things I do. I’m the classic case of a great player on a bad team, and it stinks.”

What really stinks is His Greatness just signed an extension through 2011 so they don’t have to hold a fire sale if they don’t feel like it.

If he does go, possible local suitors will include the Clippers, who have been making offers for years.

Vince Carter: He actually went to New Jersey without turning the league upside down, but Charlotte fans are all excited as the former Tar Heels star nears his opt-out.

However, during Bobcats co-owner Michael Jordan’s playing days in Washington, he once volunteered to guard Carter. Asked if he wouldn’t wear himself out, Jordan is said to have replied, “Don’t worry. He just asked me for my cell number.”

Orlando may be a suitor, as might the Clippers. With no one likely to match Carter’s present $16.4 million, it would have to be a sign-and-trade.

All Kobe, all-time

There may be a debate about the MVP, but people are pretty well agreed on the best player. LeBron James during Kobe Bryant’s 50-point steak: “I got a couple of my guys right here and we’re definitely going to find a dictionary. We’ll try to find a word to describe whatever it is he is doing. I’m in a zone and I’m averaging 31 points and he’s in something a little different right now.” ... Houston’s Tracy McGrady, asked how it feels to get on such a roll: “I really don’t know. That’s another level.... When the boy has it rolling like that, there’s nothing you can do. Trust me. I know.”

Famous last words

Boston’s Doc Rivers, whose son, Jeremiah, plays for Georgetown, asked if it’s harder to be a parent or a coach: “Oh, a parent, easy. As a coach, you can have an impact.”

-- Mark Heisler