Big screen? It’s not a JumboTron

Those who plan their lives according to pocket schedules, homestands and tipoff times might be surprised to learn that Oscar night is here.

For them, Briefing offers a quick rundown of some of the films up for major honors tonight:

* “The Departed” -- A harrowing look at the World Series success of St. Louis Cardinals David Eckstein, Jim Edmonds and Jeff Weaver through the eyes of Angels fans.

* “The Devil Wears Prada” -- Shocking expose about Mike Krzyzewski’s other shoe contract.

* “Dreamgirls” -- Uncompromising examination of Team USA basketball groupies at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics.

* “Half-Nelson” -- Controversial documentary assigns blame for the 2006-07 Golden State Warriors’ awful road record.

* “The Last King of Scotland” -- Magical fantasy, produced by British Tennis, stars promising newcomer Andy Murray.

* “The Pursuit of Happyness” -- Hardcore NASCAR fans compete in annual spelling bee.

* “Venus” -- An aging Peter O’Toole meets the jealous sister of the 2007 Australian Open women’s singles champion.

* “The Queen” -- And then he meets the jealous sister’s sister.

Trivia time

Who played football star Charles Jefferson in the 1982 movie “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”?

Be like Peyton

As Peyton Manning’s backup with the Indianapolis Colts, Jim Sorgi doesn’t play much, but he sure does listen and learn.

During Super Bowl week, Sorgi joked with reporters, “I do feel kind of anonymous. I’m the man no one wants to see play -- especially in Indianapolis. I should be the Maytag repairman, the guy bored out of my mind waiting for something to do.”

With that, another Colts quarterback has become a pitchman. Sorgi has signed a promotional deal with Whirlpool, which acquired Maytag last year, and auditioned Tuesday for the role of the repairman.

In a pep talk he delivers on his audition tape, Sorgi tells an imaginary washer and dryer: “You’re King Kong, baby, nobody can defeat you!”

Week 8 power rankings

This was the week the Lakers decided 2010 was just as important as 2007.

1. A-Rod versus Derek Jeter: Baseball teammates don’t like each other much. In 2007, this is banner-headline news. In 1974, it was just another day with the Oakland A’s.

2. Jason Kidd: The idea was to bring in somebody who can pass the ball to Kobe. Isn’t that what the rest of the Lakers are for?

3. Andrew Bynum: Sometimes the best trades are the ones that aren’t made. As Shaq was saying.

4. NFL combine: You can find coverage of football players running sprints on ESPN, but not live pro hockey. Gary Bettman’s NHL legacy.

5. Tom Brady: In Tuesday’s Boston Globe and Herald, stories about his impending fatherhood outnumbered Red Sox stories, 9-7.

6. Mickey Meyer: USC goaltender, ticketed for lewdness after pioneering new sport of strip hockey, is immediately hired as technical advisor for new Versus programming.

7. Wimbledon: All England Club officials decide it’s time to give the women the same prize money as the men. Job done, they wipe clean their monocles, straighten their top hats and amble off to their waiting horse-drawn buggies.

8. Norv Turner: There’s been a terrible mix-up. Someone in the Chargers’ public relations department overheard A.J. Smith on the phone ordering tickets for “Norbit.”

9. L.A. versus Chicago: It used to be Magic against Michael. Now it’s our vinyl stadium sun shades against their truck marshaling yards.

10. Minnesota legalizes ticket-scalping: Too late for Mike Tice.

Trivia answer

Forest Whitaker, nominated for a best-actor Oscar this year for his performance in “The Last King of Scotland.”

And finally

Miami Heat guard Jason Kapono fared much better during All-Star weekend’s three-point shootout -- he won it -- than he did at the Las Vegas clubs.

“No one invites me to any parties,” Kapono told the Chicago Tribune. Not even Heat teammate Alonzo Mourning. “He’s having a billiards thing in Vegas, and I never got [an invitation]. He doesn’t even know who I am, and I’m on his team.”

mike.penner@latimes.com