A question worth a laugh from the great beyond

“The parking enforcement people gave me a light moment in the midst of preparing my father’s funeral,” writes Susan Lowitz of L.A. She visited the Parking Violations Bureau to purchase temporary street permits near his last residence for visitors to a reception. Asked a clerk: “Do you have a letter from him?”

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The real culprit in the L.A. school system? Forget those other alleged villains -- the politicians, the bureaucracy, the teachers, the parents. Mary Campbell’s daughter Jean, a student at Vintage Magnet in North Hills, brought home a book from the school library that laid the blame on someone named Horrible Harry (see accompanying).

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On second thought: Oops, I researched further and found that the actual name of the book is “Horrible Harry and the Drop of Doom.” I guess it’s back to the other villains.

Unclear on the concept: In Pennsylvania, Raquel Landworth-Kleinhenz of Long Beach spotted a vehicle that would be unlikely to attract the attention of a cop’s radar gun (see photo).

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Are liquor prices rising as much as gasoline prices? That’s about the only explanation I can think of for the moonshine apparatus spotted by Frank Randa of Chatsworth (see accompanying).

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Dueling arrows: Anthony Eide of Burbank found a no-fishing sign that seemed to apply to only a microscopic portion of the Santa Monica Pier (see photo).

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Disastrous writing: Some of my favorite dialogue from the “L.A. Destroys Itself” series of old movies playing this week at the L.A. Film Festival:

* “This used to be a helluva town,” Lloyd Nolan, as L.A. is being flattened in “Earthquake” (playing June 30).

* “This is gonna be some kind of bitchin ride,” Peter Fonda, about to surf a tsunami from the 310 to the 213 area code in “Escape From L.A.” (playing tonight).

* “All trains as far south as Long Beach are covered by either a bazooka or a team of flame-throwers,” a military official, on the eve of an attack of giant ants in “Them” (July 1). (The heck with Orange County!)

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Another drop of doom: And then there is this pre-MapQuest exchange in “Miracle Mile” (July 1), between two diners at Johnie’s Coffee Shop, unaware that nuclear missiles are headed for Wilshire Boulevard. Diner No. 1 asks his seatmate how to get to a barbecue joint in Panorama City.

“Here, hand me your noodles,” says the seatmate, who then begins to rearrange them on the plate. “This is the Golden State, this is the Ventura, this is the 101 and this is Hogly-Wogly’s Tyler Texas Bar-B-Cue.”

“Yeah,” responds the first diner, “but what is this, then, if this is the Golden State and this is the 101?”

“I don’t know,” the seatmate says. “That’s your noodle. I didn’t put it there.”

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miscelLAny: Speaking of the L.A. Film Festival, I wish the organizers had included “Volcano,” about a lava flow that destroys everything in its path west of downtown L.A.

It never fails to move me when one motorist tells another: “Better take the freeway -- Wilshire looks pretty bad.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012, and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.