It’s tough being the boss, but Jackson’s got it worse

You probably remember the old guy Dwyre, who used to be the boss around here: Notre Dame honk who had it in for USC; “Journalist Bill,” as the late-great Jim Healy called him; had a thing for tennis, so the Tribune Co. is now up for sale because of all the money Dwyre wasted sending reporters all over the world to cover a sport no one cared to read about.

Now Dwyre writes two columns a week, and surprisingly hasn’t complained about doubling his workload since stepping down as boss.

Randy Harvey, a former Page 2 columnist, replaced Dwyre. A logical progression, if you ask me. Starred in “Play It to the Bone,” according to the Internet, along with “The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!” I’m not surprised -- he cracks me up every time he opens his mouth.

Now ordinarily I don’t pay attention to who is boss around here, but I was wondering how Harvey might react if I tossed my L.A. Times’ warm-up jacket in his lap, or walked off in a pout because he never puts me on Page 1.

I’m guessing he wouldn’t have taken the job if he knew Brian Cook and Smush Parker were going to be working at the paper. Makes you wonder what Phil Jackson was thinking when he agreed to come back.

There are obviously a lot of similarities between the two leaders. Jackson has won nine NBA titles, and Mr. Harvey’s sports section just won nine journalism awards. It’s tough to win an argument with Harvey, and Jackson is always right. Just ask him. Jackson likes to just sit there when he works and do nothing, and like I said, the two of them share a number of similarities.

They also have to deal with some odd personalities on a daily basis, and losing as both men seem to be doing these days -- whether it’s games or circulation -- I worry about the toll it might take on Jackson and how it might affect his decision to work for the Lakers beyond next year’s contract.

If Harvey can’t handle it, oh well. I would imagine the newspaper would just take the Page 2 columnist again and make him the boss.

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THERE WAS a story in the Orange County Register recently that Jackson, who has one year remaining on his deal, had already agreed to a contract extension. But no such deal has been announced and the Lakers insist the report was bogus.

“There haven’t been any formal talks yet,” a Lakers spokesman said. “Mitch Kupchak and Phil’s attorney were going to meet sometime in March, but that meeting has not taken place. I think Phil’s health will be a determining factor in what he does, and he’s probably going to have his other hip repaired this summer.”

I wonder, though, how the Lakers’ chances of winning another championship down the grinding NBA road might affect Jackson’s decision to hang around as coach beyond next season. Does he see better players over the horizon?

I also wonder about Jackson’s mental health in dealing with losing -- a seventh seeding last year, a sixth so far this year, and dealing more often now with babies such as Cook and Parker rather than high-maintenance superstars who at least offered the hope of another NBA championship payoff.

You can imagine what must be running through Jackson’s mind when he finds himself in a testy exchange with someone named Smush, or what he must be thinking when he peeks down the bench and sees Parker pouting.

You can also imagine what must be running through Jackson’s mind when he finds himself plotting to win another title, and it begins with Parker starting at point guard.

And then there’s Cook, and you thought an inconsistent Devean George had left town. You just never know what you’re going to get -- with one exception, of course. You’re not going to get much defense if you’re starting Parker and Cook.

And you just wonder, what toll is all this taking on Jackson and what he wants to do with the rest of his life?

The game with Minnesota hasn’t started yet, but they just showed Jackson on TV along with KCAL’s John Ireland, and Jackson was smiling. I can’t imagine it was anything funny Ireland said, so it’s really good to see him still enjoying himself in the middle of this miserable Lakers run. Of course, he always enjoys himself.

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IN MINNESOTA, Milwaukee and Philadelphia, the Lakers are playing three teams a combined 40 games below .500. Doesn’t get any tougher than that for the Lakers.

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THE NATIONWIDE investigation into alleged illegal sale of steroids that has already made Gary Matthews Jr. a household name -- as far as Angels’ fans go -- without stepping to the plate now includes John Rocker. At least Matthews is in good company.

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MARK HENDRICKSON’S spring training earned-run average for the Dodgers is beginning to show improvement. It’s now 14.73.

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THE PR FOLKS for the Toshiba Classic, seeking to hype the Senior Tour golfers playing in Newport, invited Page 2 to go against the pros once again -- hitting a golf ball from the top of a hotel to a green below.

I said I’d be happy to do it again, once Fuzzy Zoeller makes good on the $500 he promised to donate to the Mattel Children’s Hospital at UCLA after failing to get the ball closer to the pin than Page 2. Never heard back from the Toshiba people.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in e-mail from Kwikhit1:

“Why is Ned Colletti so bent about J.D. Drew leaving the team? Drew had the out clause in his contract and Colletti acts as if he didn’t know about it. As GM, it’s his job to know this stuff -- especially when Scott Boras is involved. Get over it, Ned. You and Colletti go way back. What’s your take on this whole thing?’

We go all the way back to Northern Illinois University together. I got the girl ... you would think by now he’d be used to opt-out clauses.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com. To read previous columns by Simers, go to latimes.com/simers.