THE ENABLER

When someone pulls a knife in a downtown bar, it’s usually time for the Enabler to close the tab. But when that knife punctures the side of a Schlitz Tall Boy, accompanied by the bartender’s command to shotgun it right now, it’s merely the beginning of the “Barmuda Triangle,” a new downtown pub crawl that breaks every liquor-before-beer platitude you learned in Sigma Nu.

The circuitous challenge involves downing three drinks at three recently hipsterized dives. The Enabler began at Bar 107, where cigar store Indians and pedophilic clown paintings are the height of fashion. The bartender stamps a “passport” after you complete each task, and Bar 107’s is to flood your gullet with 16 ounces of beer in 15 seconds while locals chant “Barmuda!”

Next is the nouveaux danceteria La Cita, where Latino regulars mingle with new Bank District scenesters. Your poison is a heaping shot of mescal. No human has ever enjoyed a shot of mescal, but that’s not the point.

Last call is at Charlie O’s in the Alexandria (the recently renovated den of affordable hipster housing). A 16-ounce “Mind Eraser” later, the Enabler skipped back to Bar 107 to collect the grand prize: a commemorative T-shirt that mislabels the location of Bar 107. “Our designer was drunk,” the bartender said. The Enabler will wear it proudly. Bar 107, 107 W. 4th St.; La Cita, 336 S. Hill St.; Charlie O’s, 501 S. Spring St.

Theguide@latimes.com