Singletary’s coaching debut a bit flashy

It’s not often you hear a coach say, “I used my pants to illustrate that we were getting our tails whipped” or read an ESPN.com report that confirms what style of underwear the coach prefers. But it’s a new era in San Francisco, now that Mike Singletary is coaching the 49ers.

Singletary pulled down his pants during his first halftime speech as an NFL head coach, an attempt to demonstrate to his players how poorly they were playing against the Seattle Seahawks.

“I needed to do something to dramatize my point,” Singletary said. “There were other ways I could have done it, but I think this got the message across.” In its reporting, ESPN.com felt the need to include a line not often seen in NFL reports: “Singletary was wearing boxers.”

As motivational tactics go, this one fell short. Trailing the Seahawks, 20-3, at halftime, the 49ers went on to lose 34-13.

Trivia time

Who was named World Series most valuable player in 1980, the last time the Philadelphia Phillies won the title?

Act fast, supplies limited

The question isn’t what’s up for sale on EBay. The question is: What isn’t?

Rainwater from Monday night’s washed-out World Series Game 5 can be yours for a minimum price of $8.99 per vial.

“You are bidding on rain from the same storm system that brought the game to a screeching halt,” reads promotional copy written by the owner, Thomas. “It was collected no more than five miles away from Citizens Bank Park. It will be contained in a small vial and sent to you via priority mail. I do not know what size vial or exactly how much but you will get no less than 2 ml.

“I took a picture of the rain I had collected in a pan that was sitting on my front steps. That is the only collection unit I used so a very limited number of vials will be available and once they are gone, they are gone.”

Thomas includes the following goes-without-saying words of caution: “Please be careful as I’m sure others will imitate and try to sell you tap water.”

But will he do dishes?

Also available on EBay: a dinner for 10 prepared at your home by former NBA player Charles Oakley.

Celebrity Charity Auctions offers this “once-in-a-lifetime” experience, coordinated by “Chef Oakley.” Promotional copy says the “winner does not have to supply food, just their home and a working kitchen.”

Current bid is listed at $770. But that includes an autographed basketball and a photo with Oakley taken at the dinner.

The phame game

Philadelphia Phillies pitcher Cole Hamels appeared on David Letterman’s show Thursday night to read his post-World Series top-10 list:

10. Maybe I’ll get to be on “Dancing With The Stars.”

9. Can I wear my cup in the off-season?

8. The Rays collapsed faster than my 401(k).

7. How cool a name is Cole Hamels?

6. This must be how the Yankees used to feel.

5. Is the Phillie Phanatic hitting on my wife?

4. Seriously, how cool a name is Cole Hamels?

3. How can I celebrate when the nation’s economic output is the weakest it’s been since the third quarter of 2001?

2. I hope John McCain will start calling me “Cole the Pitcher.”

1. Now maybe I’ll get to appear on Leno?

Trivia answer

Phillies third baseman Mike Schmidt.

A little revisionism

From Greg Cote of the Miami Herald: “Bates College, a tiny school in Maine, offers a course called ‘Red Sox Nation.’ They may be getting carried away, though. I hear they teach that the Yankees’ 26 World Series titles never actually happened.”

Mike Penner, from the Fabulous Forum