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It’s something unfamiliar for Lakers

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I’ll get to the magic that eluded Kobe & the Lakers, and my shouting match with Manny, who laughed hysterically Tuesday night every time I called him the Drug Man -- one of those silly side effects, I guess, that come with enhancing one’s female fertility.

But the conversation on the plane ride here was much more interesting with the person seated beside me, especially the part that had to do with Phil Jackson when I mentioned him to the Secret Service agent who had just retired following extended White House service.

How quickly things change, most of her recent plane rides coming on Air Force 2, and now packed into a Southwest Airlines jet with animal crackers the main course.

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Something for Phil & the guys to ponder if they go on to really blow this thing.

When I asked the Secret Service agent who had impressed her the most while on duty, I wasn’t expecting to hear Jackson’s name right away, and I didn’t, as she said it was President Reagan, followed closely by the nicest person she came across, Barbara Bush.

She also spoke highly of Chelsea Clinton.

I brought up Jackson’s name, who knows -- maybe the two of them bumping into each other in the White House following one of his many championship triumphs.

“Who?” she said, a Secret Service agent with a hearing problem coming as a big surprise.

“Phil Jackson,” I said louder. “I’ve been spending a lot of time with Phil Jackson the past few weeks.”

“Who?” she repeated. “I’m sorry, I’ve not heard of him.”

What I would have given to have Phil occupying the middle seat at that moment, nine rings not enough, and maybe even Phil calling a timeout to make sure what he was hearing.

Ten rings probably wouldn’t make that much difference to her, but the Lakers tripping all over themselves, the great Phil Jackson getting outwitted by a YMCA coach and Kobe Bryant no longer wanting it as much as a guy named Hedo, just might do it.

Everyone in the basketball world outside of Orlando expects the Lakers to win it all now, everyone in the country, though, maybe tagging along if the Magic underdogs keep winning after getting punked by 25 points in Game 1.

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And should the Magic come all the way back and win the Finals, holy Red Auerbach, the Lakers getting only so far against Detroit, Boston and Orlando -- all together now: “Phil who?”

It makes me wonder, after leaving the guy alone the last two games, if I need to start annoying him again.

BY NOW you’ve probably heard Manny spoke to reporters, but it’s what he didn’t say that speaks louder.

So I called him, demanding more than “I didn’t kill nobody, I didn’t rape nobody.”

How about steroids -- did you use them?

“That’s in the past,” he said, while essentially quoting Dodgers owner Frank McCourt.

I said that wasn’t good enough. Didn’t he owe it to the fans of L.A., who had embraced him after all the controversy in Boston, an explanation why he was missing 50 games?

Had he used steroids?

“I understand your question,” he said. “I just want to come back and play the game.”

I told him he was sneaky for speaking to reporters on the same day the Lakers were playing, knowing it wouldn’t get as much attention as the Lakers, and he laughed hysterically once again.

I told him reporters will continue to pepper him with questions about steroids because he’s not taking advantage of the opportunity to clear the air. I told him certain columnists might have to rip him with regularity. Plaschke won’t always be writing about the Lakers and one-legged soccer players.

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“That’s your job,” Manny said. “I expect you to do it. It will change nothing. It will be fine with me. No hard feelings.

“I let my fans down, and I’m sorry, but I’m moving on.”

I can’t wait to tell Gary Matthews Jr. when I join the Angels in Tampa tonight what a great role model he has become for the Dodgers’ Drug Man.

REMEMBER WHEN Sasha Vujacic, who signed a three-year contract extension for $15 million, wanted to be known as the “Machine”? The Machine is consistent, all right, one miss in each game so far, which is to say he has not shown up.

TIGER WOODS was sitting courtside. I have no idea how he could afford such a ticket.

JUST WONDERING if Bryant was gassed late in the game after pushing himself in the first half in an effort to impress Woods?

At one point he made a difficult shot and then turned to the courtside seats occupied by Woods and Spike Lee.

I can’t imagine Woods hitting a three-iron stiff on the third hole and then turning to the gallery to check out Kobe’s reaction.

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PAU GASOL is the reason Bryant has the chance to win another title, but he really is a big baby, whining on almost every foul call. Just one more reason why it’s so difficult to embrace these guys.

I REALIZE most people think the media loves the “gotcha” game, and until anyone suggests different, it appears there was good reason to play that game with USC’s Tim Floyd.

But right now I only know Floyd as a really good guy, making Tuesday’s news very disappointing, and more than that, devastating -- knowing what it means for his career as a basketball coach.

I wanted to believe he was innocent, but USC’s position, as well as his own, to remain mum, was certainly not well thought out -- unless the truth was going to do him in.

THE MAGIC called on 7-year-old Gina Marie Incandela to sign the national anthem, doctors telling her mother early on she might never speak and her not doing so until age 3.

Sent to a special school to help children with autism, music appealed to her, and now in six playoff appearances with the youngster belting out the anthem, the Magic has yet to lose.

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I have a pretty good hunch who will be singing Thursday night.

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t.j.simers@latimes.com

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