The procrastinator’s New Year’s Eve

Perhaps you’ve just emerged from a Christmas food coma or have serious time management issues, but now you’ve arrived at New Year’s Eve without plans. We’ve got you covered. From top-ticket bashes to fun stops with friends, here are a few quick points of navigation before your party ship sails.

Pony up: If you love a good train wreck, get over your crowd complex and hit Hollywood. The mess of traffic, mile-long lines and drunken scenes is really what New Year’s Eve is all about. Las Palmas, frequented by stars from Avril Lavigne to Adam Levine, is having a to-do with a sponsored Grey Goose and Champagne bar from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. It’ll set you back $150 for basic entrance, but you’ll have a place to post up in the madness.

Your own “Hangover” sequel: If Vegas is doable, we’ve already warned you that Kim Kardashian is taking over Tao. Additional draws include Jay Sean at the Bank and B.o.B. at Jet — but nothing will beat the excitement of the Cosmopolitan opening, where Jay-Z and Coldplay will combine forces to open the sexy new space. We’d recommend showing up just to take in the scene — tickets or not, you might grab a glance of Beyoncé and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Everybody knows your name (before shots): The Happy Ending on Sunset near La Brea is a sports and novelty bar at its finest. You and a few compadres can pop in for the countdown, free popcorn and a wheel of discount shots.

Snowpocalypse victims, we hear you: Should any of our beloved Angelenos be stranded on the chilly East Coast thanks to a certain nor’easter, we recommend you hire a Sherpa and get home. If you must stay, you can hop down to Seaside Heights, N.J., where MTV is dropping Snooki in a ball beside the “Jersey Shore” condo. Again: Snooki. In. Ball. calendar@latimes.com