Jennifer Garner vividly details her torturous, panic-inducing Oscars dress
Jennifer Garner spilled a major red-carpet secret on “The Tonight Show” on Wednesday: Her Oscars gown was a weapon of deception -- and perhaps one of rib destruction.
The “Miracles From Heaven” star donned a black one-shoulder Atelier Versace gown to the 88th Academy Awards last month that created the illusion of a waistline for the mother of three in a “legit” way.
“What they do is they move your organs around,” Garner, 43, told host Jimmy Fallon. “It’s a two-part thing. Basically, there are two men who come in with screw guns and they screwed me into a metal corset -- this isn’t true -- but it was a metal corset. There were two Italian people who were talking very quickly and the next thing you know my ribs were compressed!”
And it’s nothing like Spanx, which Fallon thought might be the case.
“No, dude, it’s not like that. It’s so intense,” she said. “It’s not like Scarlett O’Hara. There’s metal inside it and these people just kind of move your ribs and they move your liver to the side and they pop you in.”
If that doesn’t sound comfy, it’s not.
“It turns out four hours in it’s not [comfortable], but to keep you in place you step into a bodysuit first,” she said, describing the suit she wore as “the bottom of a leotard, but like a thong.”
Garner said she couldn’t breathe and that she had to stand up, even if people will “think you’re Kanye West.”
Mercifully, a commercial break gave her a minute to get backstage. But that’s when she realized she had to go the bathroom and a friend had to assist her, bridesmaids-to-brides style.
“It’s worse than a snowsuit. It’s worse than a toddler in a snowsuit, because of the bodysuit and the connection of the bodysuit was in an intimate position,” she said, motioning that the bodysuit’s hook-and-eye closure was pretty much in her lady parts and she couldn’t reach it.
Our best and worst list.(Jay L. Clenenin / Los Angeles Times)
Naomi Watts earned a spot on our best-dressed list thanks to her sapphire blue and bright purple Armani Prive gown, fully embroidered in stripes of Swarovski crystals, sequins and Lurex thread.(Jordan Strauss / Invision / AP, left; Richard Shotwell / Invision / AP, center; Mike Nelson / EPA, right)
Julianne Moore’s choice of a black Chanel haute couture gown with tone-on-tone embellishments earned her a spot on the best-dressed list.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times)
Among the best-dressed men was Jared Leto, who made the grade thanks to his custom Gucci evening suit with red contrast piping.(Paul Buck / EPA, left; Allen J. Schaben / Los Angeles Times, center; Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times, right)
Michael Fassbender’s peak lapel Tom Ford placed him among the evening’s best-dressed men.( Jason Merritt/Getty Images)
Brie Larson’s choice of a custom Gucci lapis blue silk organza gown made her our choice for a spot on the best-dressed list.(Mark Boster / Los Angeles Times, left; Allen J. Schaben / Los Angeles Times, center; Al Seib/ Los Angeles Times, right)
“Star Wars: The Force Awakens” actress Daisy Ridley in a silver Chanel Haute Couture gown makes our best-dressed list.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times, left and right; Jason Merritt / Getty Images, center;)
Cate Blanchett wears an Armani Privé sea-foam green, cap-sleeve mermaid gown that features hand-sewn clusters of Swarovski crystals and white feathers. On trend -- and on our best-dressed list.(Jay L. Clenenin / Los Angeles Times)
Alicia Vikander (“The Danish Girl”) has been killing it in Louis Vuitton on this awards season’s red carpets, and this Oscars dress continued that trend.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times, left; Valerie Macon / AFP/Getty Images, center; Jason Merritt/Getty Images, Jason Merritt/Getty Images, right )
Kerry Washington makes our best-dressed list thanks to this gladiator-appropriate custom Atelier Versace gown with a black leather bustier, white skirt and the fiercest thigh-high leg slit to hit the red carpet since Angelina Jolie’s meme-launching moment.(Jay L. Clenenin / Los Angeles Times)
We like Rooney Mara and we like Givenchy. But this combination -- and the belly-button-baring diamond cutout -- is among our least favorite looks of the night.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times)
The simple, straightforward strapless gown is usually a can’t-lose proposition for Reese Witherspoon. But here, the way the fabric sits at the bodice makes the dress look like a work in progress -- and makes it one of our least favorite looks of the night.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times, left and right; Jordan Strauss / Invision / AP, center)
Pharrell William, seen with Helen Lasichanh, earned a spot on our worst-dressed list for his inexplicably rolled-up tuxedo trouser legs.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times)
Sofia Vergara’s Marchesa dress was another busy-bodice mess (see also: Reese Witherspoon), that landed her on this year’s worst-dressed list.(Allen J. Schaben / Los Angeles Times)
From the front, Olivia Wilde’s dress from Valentino’s Spring 2016 Haute Couture collection was an awkward exercise in Oscar-level side boob. From the back it looked like she was wearing a folded dinner napkin. For this she lands on this year’s worst-dressed list.(Jay L. Clenenin / Los Angeles Times)
Heidi Klum’s purple “bridesmaids gone bad” number looks like it’s 30 seconds from becoming a full-on wardrobe malfunction. For that she rounds out our worst-dressed list.(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times)
But her good friend helped her save the day -- and her ribs.
Ah, the things people do for fashion.
Follow me on Twitter @NardineSaad.
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