The Times’ NBA rankings

Rank Team (Record) Comments

BLADES OF GLORY

1. MIAMI (54-14) The only way to top this kind of streaking is if Will Ferrell heads to South Beach. (1)

2. SAN ANTONIOI. (53-16) If Spurs become loss No. 30 in Heat streak they could be on a “30 for 30.” (2)

THE PRODUCERS

3. OKLAHOMA CITY (51-19) Remember us? Team that was talk of NBA is on mute during Heat streak. (3)

4. DENVER (49-22) Nuggets should dub their recent run of success Streak Junior. (4)

5. MEMPHIS (47-22) Grizzlies are eager to avenge playoff humiliation by Clippers, Page 2. (5)

6. CLIPPERS (47-22) Vinny Del Negro is suddenly on coaching equivalent of a 10-day contract. (6)

7. INDIANA (43-27) Pacers can always hope Heat has nothing left for the playoffs. (7)

8. NEW YORK (42-26) Late-season fade is probably a prelude to another first-round flop. (8)

9. BROOKLYN (40-28) Nets should play “Back in the U.S.S.R.” to celebrate first playoffs since ’97. (9)

THE OTHER GUYS

10. GOLDEN STATE (39-31) Spurs reduce big men David Lee and Andrew Bogut to Lilliputian status. (10)

11. ATLANTA (38-31) Friday losses weren’t how the Hawks coach and his Bruins son Drew it up. (11)

12. HOUSTON (38-31) As if Kings didn’t have enough regrets, Thomas Robinson may be next. (14)

13. LAKERS (36-34) Devin Ebanks is no longer a Trevor Ariza clone considering Ariza plays. (12)

14. CHICAGO (37-31) Derrick Rose, king of uncertainty, should be Waffle House pitchman. (13)

15. BOSTON (36-33) Retail execs need to teach late-fading Celtics the art of the closeout. (15)

16. MILWAUKEE (34-34) Larry Sanders’ season in a nutshell: rejections and ejections. (17)

17. UTAH (34-35) Jazz needs Sidney Lowe to play 1983 N.C. State footage for inspiration. (16)

18. DALLAS (33-36) Nobody’s shaving even though Mavericks get nicked on a nearly nightly basis. (18)

19. PORTLAND (33-36) Sets off sirens in Atlanta with win after police chase delays arrival. (19)

SEMI-PRO

20. WASHINGTON (25-43) Inflicts capital punishment on Lakers for sloppiness despite three days off. (23)

21. TORONTO (26-44) Alan Anderson can tell grandkids about nearly outscoring Carmelo Anthony. (20)

22. PHILADELPHIA (26-42) It’s safe to say Andrew Bynum won’t be signing his next contract at Fair Lanes. (21)

23. MINNESOTA (24-43) In a season of losses, Rick Adelman’s departure would be biggest. (22)

24. SACRAMENTO (25-45) Kings ring Clippers’ bell one last time before leaving cow town for good. (24)

25. PHOENIX (23-47) Wins over Lakers show Suns don’t recognize Be Kind to Senior Citizens Day. (28)

26. DETROIT (24-47) On the bright side, Heat loss could make forgettable Pistons a part of history. (25)

27. NEW ORLANDO (24-46) What’s left to play for? Millions, judging by these guys’ paychecks. (27)

28. CLEVELAND (22-47) Cavaliers now realize Heat had enough juice without dripping scoreboard. (26)

29. ORLANDO (18-52) Magic is like a recent vintage bottle of Bordeaux: best after 2017. (29)

ELF

30. CHARLOTTE (16-53) Upside to Brendan Haywood’s season-ending injury is no one may notice. (30)