Now Just Picture ‘Em Singing in the Shower ...

Earlier this week, armchair musicologists across the nation went into overdrive when the media revealed the contents of the presidential iPod. If music does indeed make the man, as experts suggest, the First Playlist tells us that George W. Bush is a down-home country boy (Alan Jackson, George Jones) with a sensitive side (Joni Mitchell) and a hint of naughtiness (the Knack’s “My Sharona”). What similar conclusions can we draw from other newsmakers’ iPods?

Dick Cheney: “You and Me Against the World”; “Total Eclipse of the Heart”

Donald Rumsfeld: “Rocket Man”; “Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word”

Condoleezza Rice: “Hopelessly Devoted to You”

Karl Rove: “Under My Thumb”; “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy?”

Alberto Gonzales: “Whip It”

Colin Powell: “Free Bird”

John Bolton: “It’s the End of the World as We Know It (and I Feel Fine)”

Jalal Talabani: “I’m Your Puppet”

Mahmoud Abbas: “Don’t Fence Me In”

Saddam Hussein: “You Dropped a Bomb on Me”

Kofi Annan: “Won’t Get Fooled Again”; “Carry On, Wayward Son”

Bill Clinton: “Sexual Healing”

Al Gore: “March of the Wooden Soldiers”

John Kerry: “I’m a Loser”

Ralph Nader: “Born to Run”

Dennis Hastert: “Our House”

Nancy Pelosi: “Our House”

Tom DeLay: “Burnin’ Down the House”

John McCain: “Always True to You in My Fashion”

Zell Miller: “Crazy” (Patsy Cline), “Crazy” (k.d. lang), “Crazy” (Willie Nelson)

Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger: “Smoke Gets in Your Eyes”

Barry Bonds: “Pump It Up”

Bill O’Reilly: “I Just Called to Say I Love You”

Michael Jackson: “The Kids Are Alright”; “Can’t Help Myself”

Maria Shriver: “Take This Job and Shove It”

Bruce Kluger and David Slavin write satire for National Public Radio’s “All Things Considered.”