20 signs you’re ready for the Lakers’ 2012-13 season

The anticipation’s only going to increase as training camp approaches.

But hardly a day goes that Laker fans aren’t thinking about the 2012-13 season. They felt irritated when the Lakers lost in five games to the Oklahoma City Thunder in the Western Conference semifinals. They felt anxious as to whether the Lakers could significantly upgrade their roster despite the limited trade assets and bloated payroll. They felt elated when the Lakers somehow managed to do it again by securing Steve Nash and Dwight Howard.

The Lakers have their media day on Oct. 1 and then start training camp the next day. But that’s just making Laker fans more restless. Here are 20 signs that suggest, for the sake of your sanity, you’re ready for the season to start today.

1. You’ve made daily trips to Dwight Howard’s Beverly Hills hotel and Newport Beach residence in hopes you run into him. Your hope is that your lone conversation with Howard will convince him to stay after this season.

2. You’ve already started camping out on Figueroa Street so you have a secure spot for the Lakers’ championship parade.

3. You’ve written over 1,000 thank-you letters to Lakers’ owner Jerry Buss, General Manager Mitch Kupchak and executive vice president of player personnel Jim Buss for assembling such a great roster. You’ve also sent Jim Buss countless apology letters for all the criticism you heaped on him over the years.

4. You still use the ESPN trade machine. The Lakers don’t need to make any more moves. But being a dissatisfied Lakers fan, well you just can’t help yourself.

5. You endlessly watch the Time Warner Cable promo highlighting its 20-year, $5-billion broadcast deal with the Lakers. Of course, this just leaves you wondering whether your cable subscriber will actually have this channel once the season starts.

6. You’ve bought endless instructional tapes on the Princeton offense. You just hope the actual Laker players have been just as diligent.

7. You attended Metta World Peace’s comedy show Thursday night at the Laugh Factory. Part of you wanted to feel amused by World Peace’s antics. Part of you wanted to see for yourself whether World Peace actually looks in shape as I’ve reported.

8. You make daily visits to the Lakers’ practice facility, hoping this one time the team lets you in to watch informal workouts.

9. NBA 2K13 doesn’t come out until Oct. 2. So that’s left you playing NBA 2K12 and making all the necessary trades keep the Lakers’ roster current. Every time you win a championship with the Lakers, you have your own champagne bath. Every time you lose, you simply hit the reset button.

10. You’ve made a star map detailing all the residences of the Lakers. You consult this daily so you can run into them. Worse, you’ve tried selling these maps to your friends.

11. Earlier this summer, a group of Laker fans spotted Steve Nash’s cab on the L.A. freeway and handed a beer to him through the car window (as seen in the video above). You and a group of friends have navigated all the L.A. freeways every day in hopes Nash happens to be there again, ready for the beer hand-off.

12. You’ve written out what Kobe Bryant might say in his induction speech when he joins the Memorial Naismith Basketball Hall of Fame.

13. You’ve made a few trips to Germany just in case Bryant decided to get another procedure over there.

14. You’ve constructed out of clay the mold the prototype of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar’s statue, wondering if his unveiling on Nov. 16 will match your model.

15. You endlessly argue with your neighbors about who is the greatest Laker of all time. Sometimes you change your opinion simply so you can argue.

16. You’ve taken up golf as a hobby and have visited countless courses around L.A. You’ve done this just so it increases the chance you run into Jerry West.

17. You’ve set up countless lemonade stands this summer and plan to give the Lakers your earnings. Your hope is that it will help the Lakers, at least to some degree, deal with the harsh luxury taxes.

18. You’ve watched the introductory press conferences of Howard, Nash and Antawn Jamison so often that you’ve memorized every question and answer.

19. As Thunder Coach Scott Brooks hosted an invitational at Pelican Hill Golf Club on Tuesday, you endlessly taunted him about the Lakers’ off-season moves.

20. You visit The Times’ Lakers Now blog every day. I really appreciate the support.

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