These Kids Know Their Rams

Pete Donovan, the Rams’ public relations director, is the manager of the club’s softball team, which plays in a Fullerton municipal league. This conversation between two boys on bicycles was overheard:

“Who are those guys?” one asked.

“I don’t know,” said the other, noting the names on the backs of the T-shirts. “Harrah, Cromwell, Donovan. . . . Hey, it’s the Rams.”

“Yeah, but who’s Donovan?”

“I don’t know, but he’s an old guy. Must be a quarterback.”

Trivia Time: When Bobby Thomson hit the three-run homer that gave the the New York Giants the National League pennant in 1951, he scored Clint Hartung and Whitey Lockman ahead of him. How did Hartung get on base? (Answer below.)

Add Forgettable Quotes: Kansas City Kings Coach Cotton Fitzsimmons, on why he wasn’t interested in drafting Indiana State All-American Larry Bird in 1978: “I already have two white guys on my team.”

Fitzsimmons currently is unemployed.

Said Larry Bird, after becoming only the third player in NBA history to win the Most Valuable Player award three years in a row: “I’m proud to be in the same group with Bill Russell, because he was a Celtic, but Wilt Chamberlain talks too much for me.”

Add Bird: Asked if he thought brother Eddie Bird, who announced this week he will attend Indiana State, should change his name to avoid comparisons, he said: “No, but I wish he’d change his address. I’m getting tired of supporting him.”

Baylor football Coach Grant Teaff, after watching Randy Barnes of Texas A&M; set an NCAA freshman record of 71-9 1/2 in the shotput, said: “Some cannon balls in the Civil War didn’t travel that far.”

Utah Jazz Coach Frank Layden, on his barber: “I get my haircuts the same place Jerry Tarkanian does. Actually, Tark only gets estimates.”

Don Mattingly of the Yankees told Ira Berkow of the New York Times that he never fraternizes with opposing players on the field.

“I did once though,” he said. “I was with Nashville, the Yankees’ Double-A team, and the Yankees came to town for an exhibition game. This is a big thing with the minor league players, while the Yankees are unmotivated, as you’d expect. I was kind of awed then, and I remember Reggie Jackson got a hit and he’s on first base. He doesn’t say anything to me. He’s talking to the first base coach. And I’m a lowly rookie; I’m not going to say anything to Reggie Jackson.

“Then just as the pitcher goes into his stretch, Reggie sticks out his hand and says, ‘Hi, I’m Reggie Jackson.’

“What do you do? I shook his hand.”

Sam Snead, asked by Golf magazine to rate the greatest golfers in history, led with Jack Nicklaus, followed by Byron Nelson and Ben Hogan. Then came Lee Trevino, Arnold Palmer, Gary Player, Bobby Jones, Tom Watson and Seve Ballesteros.

Trivia Answer: He ran for Don Mueller, who broke his ankle sliding into third base following a double by Lockman.

Quotebook

Notre Dame football Coach Lou Holtz, on why he asks his players not to swear: “The Good Lord allows just so much profanity on a team, and I use up our entire quota.”