Mrs. Gooch’s: A Groaning Board Report

“I once brought calamata olives to the Hollywood Bowl,” my friend Claire said, “not knowing it was my date’s favorite food. He nearly fell in love with me on the spot. With this sandwich, he wouldn’t have had a chance.”

“This sandwich,” a Halliburton assemblage of thin-leaved rare roast beef and fluffy smoked trout pate, was one of the superior fixings from the Natural Deli department at Mrs. Gooch’s in Beverly Hills. (The Glendale and Northridge stores have delis too, and one’s on the way at the Sherman Oaks branch.)

Claire may prefer her men salty but she wants her meals salt-free and rarely finds a take-out joint that doesn’t oversalt its food. Since Mrs. Gooch’s doesn’t have any (take a deep breath) nitrates, nitrites, refined flour, refined sugar, preservatives, additives, artificial colors or flavorings, hydrogenated oils or irradiated food, I figured they’d be light handed with the salt. True to form, they were.

With its wide aisles, classical music and shopping bags that teach you a thing or two, Mrs. Gooch’s has a hypnotic way of lulling you into the consumer mode. I wandered around trance-like past the horned melons, burdock root, rapini and the prettiest radishes I’ve ever seen, and stood mesmerized in front of the deli counter the length of a good-sized rig.

Hands down, they win the Not-a-Single-Gloppy-Salad-in-the-Deli-Case Award and, believe me, this is a rare prize. Mama Gooch may not be in the kitchen (all the food is prepared at a central commissary), but her factotum is doing fine work. Here’s the groaning board report:

Poached smoked salmon, with green peppercorns, is exquisite, delicate--and $18.95 per pound. The aforementioned trout “pate” is absolutely erotic and freezes beautifully, but really should be called a “mousse.” Still in the smoked family, paper-thin slices of turkey breast ($8.99 a pound) would make a lovely spring lunch. Maple cured ham, with the tiniest gusts of nutmeg and maple, tastes rather like roast pork.

I was all ready to roll my eyes at “tofu treasures” ($1.29 apiece) but, warmed up at home, these crisp tofu wrappers filled with savoy cabbage and straw mushrooms had the charm of a light egg foo young. I am not a tofu salad convert (and this incarnation still looks like “mock egg salad” to me), but Claire, who does eat her way through numerous tofu salads around town assures me that Mrs. Gooch’s makes a superior blend.

Something called “Caesar shrimp salad” was filled with large delicious barbecued shrimp but had nothing Caesar salad-ish about it. (“Maybe someone named Caesar prepared it,” Claire offered, taking another bite of this $16-a-pound delight.)

California vegetable loaf ($4.98 a pound), dashed with tarragon, and filled with corn and zucchini, had a light, crisp crust. Perky blue corn jalapeno corn bread was soft like down-home spoon bread. (It’s best heated up.) Cole slaw is crunchy and very, very light--no traditional deli goop here. Similarly, properly undercooked red skinned potato salad with fresh dill, is the clean, crew-cut variety. Caramelized baked beans with a whammo sweet-healthy-traditional taste are the Ralph Lauren of New England baked beans.

There are several chicken salads at any one time and each is generously filled with hearty chunks of white meat. In the $8-$9 range, the classic, curried and Orientalized salads are mixed with crisp vegetables and punchily spiced. Cold baked chicken breasts with rosemary and lemon ($6.99 a pound) was juicy too. I’d pass on the skewers of barbecued teriyaki shrimp ($2.90 for three large, tough shrimp) and wait until the crunchy three-bean Mediterranean salad is dressed less vacuously. But I’d happily nosh on those itsy bitsy chicken drumettes served with a slow-cooked onion-tomato marmalade again. And I think my vegetarian friends would feel content eating the spicy, dense tomato-sauced spinach balls.

The Greek salad, with red, green and yellow peppers, creamy feta and superior calamatas, ($5.95 a pound) is exactly to the point, while rice almondine (kashi, wild rice, brown rice, loads of fresh oregano and rosemary and almond slivers) has a crunchy, almost-raw taste.

Don’t forget the meat department--there are good things to take out over there, too. Barbecued turkey thighs were particularly succulent and country-style pork ribs were meaty and lean. Barbecued chickens (all from those superior, non-narcotic families) are cloaked with the thinnest of simple glazes.

If you’re not in the mood for a fabulous fruit salad ($4.95 a pound), with each taste distinct, you can sidle over to the Natural Bakery. There are wheat-free muffins, dairy-free goodies, juice-sweetened things and lavish (and pricey) frou frou affairs like blueberry-cream cheese tarts and three-layer apple cakes. You’ll find carob brownies and sesame cookies and very good, non-sexist molasses- and ginger-filled “ginger persons” at 49 cents each. You don’t have to wait until Hollywood Bowl time. Get thee to those gingerperson’s natural currant eyes right now.

Mrs. Goach’s Natural Deli, 239 N. Crescent Drive, Beverly Hills, (213) 274-3360. Open seven days a week, 9:00 a.m.- 9:00 p.m. MC and Visa accepted. Parking lot,

Also, 826 N. Glendale Ave., Glendale. (818) 240-9350 and 9350 Reseda Blvd., Northridge. (818) 701-5122.