Padre Notebook : Life Was a Mystery for McKeon When He Turned Into the Thin Man

This just in from the Maybe-His-Uniform-Really-Doesn’t-Fit Dept:

The first thing Jack McKeon did when he became Padres manager was to place pitching coach Pat Dobson in charge of making all pitching changes. The second thing he did was place captain Garry Templeton in charge of presenting the lineup card to the umpires before the game.

So just when is No. 15 ever going to be where somebody can see him?

“I like to delegate authority, let my people do things, give everybody their own part of this,” McKeon said. “What the heck do I have to always go out there for?”

McKeon claims this has nothing to do with the way he looks in his uniform, which actually isn’t as bad as expected for a man who hasn’t squeezed into one since back before squeezing into your pants was popular.

For the record, the McKeon, who is 5-feet 8-inches, would like to give an official weight for all those wondering: 208 pounds.

“I’m serious,” said McKeon, who upon his hiring was listed at anywhere from 220 to 230. “Hey, I’ve lost 14 pounds in the last couple of weeks, and this is before I knew I’d be manager.

“That weight thing is overrated anyway. I signed my first contract as a 248-pound catcher. Before I reported to Greenville, Ala., I jogged around in army pants and got down to 230.

“Then I caught 126 games in that Alabama heat and it was a wonder I didn’t die. I didn’t, just lost more pounds, got down to 207. I did the same jogging around in that off-season and reported for my second season at 172, swear to God. I thought, this is great. I’m finally in shape.”

McKeon pauses here for dramatic effect. When telling stories, McKeon pauses so infrequently, those pauses always supply dramatic effect.

“And at 172 pounds . . . it was the worst year of my damn life. I got hit in the head with a bat, I broke my ankle, all kinds of things. That’s what happens when you lose that much weight, I’m convinced.”

Phenomenon of the Week: In a span of seven plate appearances in Philadelphia, catcher Benito Santiago walked four times.

No big deal? We don’t want to say the guy swings a bat as if he’s trying to kill flies, but check it out: Last year, in 572 plate appearances, he was walked unintentionally just 14 times. That’s one walk every 41 times he stepped up, or about one every two weeks.

For comparison’s sake, look at Carmelo Martinez, Santiago’s buddy and the same type of hitter. In 1987, he was unintentionally walked 65 times in 525 plate appearances, once every eight at-bats, or every couple of days.

Upon acceptance of his Rookie of the Year award this winter, Santiago was heard saying this: “I will try to be more patient at the plate, make the pitchers work more.”

Sure. In his first 162 plate appearances this year, he walked once. That’s once in 48 games. It was on a Sunday, May 8, in Pittsburgh, at 2:36 p.m. Hang around him for a hack or two, you learn to keep track of these things.

The pitcher was Doug Drabek, who later blew a no-hitter in the top of the ninth, perhaps out of despondency.

But then came last Monday night in Philadelphia, when Santiago led off the sixth inning against pitcher Shane Rawley with a walk. It perhaps so unnerved Rawley, he promptly allowed a double and another walk before working out of the jam.

Two plate appearances later, in the second inning Tuesday night against David Palmer, Santiago drew another walk. It may have shaken Palmer, who had allowed one run at the time, into allowing four more in the next three innings.

Palmer may have been so upset, he did the unthinkable. He actually walked Santiago again in the fifth. Finally, in the ninth inning against former Padre Greg Harris, Santiago walked again.

Although there is no sane explanation for any of this, it is worth noting that McKeon had his first talk with Santiago the afternoon before he drew his first walk this week.

“I told him to lay off the high pitch, simple as that,” McKeon said. “When we get beat we are always talking about how giving up leadoff walks killed us. So how come we aren’t drawing some off other pitchers? I just told Benny that. So maybe he listened.”

Blatant Assumption of the Week: New York’s Shea Stadium scoreboard referred to the Padres shortstop as “Richard Thon.”

Blatant Assumption II: You think Eric Show is an unlucky pitcher? He is one of only two Padre starters who haven’t been hit with an unearned run (run by error) this year. Mark Grant is the other.

One Happy Camper: Perhaps nobody celebrated Larry Bowa’s firing in a more subtle but convincing way than a pitcher who isn’t even with the Padres--Eric Nolte of triple-A Las Vegas.

Late last year Nolte was the Padres’ top young starting pitcher, but this spring he was forced to the bullpen by a healthy Andy Hawkins. Once there, Nolte felt out of place, and when he couldn’t perform, he felt constantly intimidated by Bowa.

He was sent to the minor leagues April 17 after two appearances in which he allowed just two runs and two walks in three innings. Upon his demotion, he sobbed openly in the clubhouse. Once at Las Vegas, once again a starting pitcher, he remained in his funk, accumulating a 10.27 ERA in eight games and allowed Tucson seven runs in 1 awful innings May 26.

Two days later, Bowa was fired. A couple days after that, last Wednesday, Nolte threw perhaps his best game of the season. In 5 innings against Phoenix, he allowed five hits and three runs and threw 55% strikes.

“I don’t want to say anything, but I think everybody knew what some of the problems were,” Nolte said. “Now I’ve got to work this out for myself. Now it’s all on me, and I like that.”

One Still-Not-So-Happy Camper: Just when Bowa’ departure has cleared the way for Stanley Jefferson’s return to sanity and the big leagues, the sensitive outfielder is seeing a Las Vegas doctor for stomach problems.

Blue Moonlighting: Nobody regretted Wednesday’s five-hour, rain delayed, 9-7 loss in Philadelphia more than Tony Gwynn.

Not only did he hate losing, but he absolutely deplored not flying out of Philadelphia until around 1:30 a.m. He was scheduled to shoot a McDonald’s commercial that morning in San Diego at 8 a.m.

It appeared Gwynn would be lucky to get a couple of hours sleep before the shoot . . . that is, if he had already memorized his lines. One problem here.

“Thing is, I haven’t seen the script yet,” Gwynn said Wednesday afternoon. “They sent it to me while we’ve been on the road. I don’t know what it says. I’m looking at no sleep at all.”

The people who used to sing that you deserve break today obviously didn’t mean everybody.

.