Brunch With Bite : To shake the weekend doldrums, go ethnic

Shall we “do brunch”?

Oh, no. No, no, no. Not this morning. We can’t face eggs Benedict at all today, and if we have to look one more carved ham in the face we’re going to throw a melon ball at somebody. It won’t be a pretty sight.

The very idea is giving us a headache. Well, possibly we already had the headache, but anyway we’ve got to get out of the house . . . and get something to eat, that much is clear.

Not eggs Benedict, though, anything but eggs Benedict. It may be brunch time, but today we need a Brunch From Beyond.

Caribbean. Aha. Huevos negros : eggs crusted with an ominous black paste of chiles. They look like truck-stop fried eggs in hell. They also taste like fried eggs from hell, ferociously hot. Just what we wanted, the exact opposite of eggs Benedict. With a plate of these little puppies and maybe a hasty gallon of ice water, we’re feeling better already.

This is Cafe Mambo, a bright, informal little place that always has fun art on the walls. It may be a little loud for brunch, but it’s open early and the eclectic food goes a long way toward curing brunch melancholia. In addition to spicy things like chilaquiles (eggs, chorizo and tortilla chips scrambled together) there are hotcakes and more conventional breakfast items. And the coffee is whimsically flavored with vanilla.

Cafe Mambo, 707 Heliotrope St., Hollywood. (213) 663-5800. Saturday and Sunday brunch from 9 a.m. American Express, MasterCard and Visa accepted. Brunch for two, food only, $10-$20.

Greek. Oh boy, a show. Waiters with Greek accents are flourishing plates at us. First there are salads and Near Eastern dips-- hummus , baba ghannouj and taramosalata (all pretty good, though the hummus could use more sesame).

Then they bring out crisp-fried calamari , a homey dish of pasta baked with ground beef and cream sauce called pastitsio , rather plain beef meatballs and grape leaves generously stuffed with beef in a piquant dill-egg-lemon sauce. The star is a truly wonderful moussaka. Its beef filling is thick and spicy with cinnamon and clove, and the eggplant layer is topped with the fluffiest egg custard.

The secret here is to order either espresso or Greek coffee afterward, because it comes with lumps of “Greek Delight,” a jellied rosewater candy that is perfect for this hour of the morning: not too chewy and not too sweet.

The Great Greek, 13362 Ventura Blvd., Sherman Oaks. (818) 905-5250. Sunday brunch from 11:30 a.m. All major credit cards accepted. Brunch for two, sparkling wine included, $25.90. Ethiopian. All right. This is definitely exotic. On weekdays Keste Demena is your typical little Ethiopian restaurant with travel posters on the walls and spicy stewed lamb dishes on the menu, but on Sundays it serves five Ethiopian breakfast dishes, all liberally laced with red pepper and richly aromatic Ethiopian spiced butter. They’re a little bit like nursery food, but definitely for grown-ups.

Some are a bit like porridge, some are bready. One of the best is shehan fuul, boiled fava beans topped with chopped onions, tomatoes and green peppers, to say nothing of lime juice, cayenne and mass quantities of spiced butter. The most substantial dish, and possibly the hottest, is tire sega, a real caveman meal of chunks of very tender raw beef served on sourdough Ethiopian injera bread with a mound of peppery spice paste.

Keste Demena Ethiopian Restaurant, 5779 W. Venice Blvd., Los Angeles. (213) 933-6522. Sunday brunch from 10 a.m. American Express, MasterCard and Visa accepted. Brunch for two, food only, $5.50 to $14.50.

Cajun. As a meal, brunch has one big failing--not enough emphasis on staggeringly rich desserts. We’re tempted to stop off and have some ice cream in order to achieve the proper aesthetic balance for this hour of morning. In fact, let’s.

No, let’s not. Instead, we’ll go to Patout’s. We’ll eat homey Cajun food from a menu that changes every weekend, and we’ll listen to a fairly loud Cajun/C&W; band. Oysters Alexander has a slightly peppery shrimp topping, much like the one on the lima beans and the wonderfully hearty whipped potatoes. Shrimp creole comes with a thick tomato sauce. And Patout’s peculiar gumbo is rather like plain chicken soup.

All are mere prelude. The whole point of brunch here is the rich Southern desserts, such as warm bread pudding with bourbon sauce or a sweet potato-pecan pie with a crisp, biscuit-like crust and a sweet potato filling topped with plenty of pecans.

Patout’s, 2260 Westwood Blvd., West Los Angeles. (213) 475-7100. Sunday brunch from 11:30 a.m. All major credit cards accepted. Brunch for two, with sparkling wine, $36.

Indian. It certainly looks like we’re in for brunch here. This pink and burgundy room with tall mirrors and planter boxes around the walls is suspiciously brunch-like. It could pass for one of those hotel ballrooms where brunch might be served buffet-style from . . . hey, they are serving brunch from steam tables.

But it’s Indian food: beef and lamb shish kebabs, lamb curry with lots of ground onions, chicken curry heavy on the turmeric, and tandoori chicken (served cold). Lots of vegetarian dishes, too: pilaf heavy on the black cumin, several mixed vegetable curries, nice light spinach fritters (pakora), yellow lentils and so on. Nothing is terribly spicy, but the traditional mint chutney and a sort of cabbage and pea curry comes close.

The best of the Indian sweets is the honey-soaked cake rasgola, for once neither soggy nor stale. And it’s topped with edible silver foil. Yes, you can actually eat a precious metal for breakfast here.

We definitely feel better.

Gaylord’s, 50 N. La Cienega, Beverly Hills. (213) 652-3838. Saturday and Sunday brunch from noon. All major credit cards accepted. Brunch for two, sparkling wine included, $25.90.